November 14, 2023 | Sammy Tran

What Not To Do On A First Date

Here's What You Shouldn't Do On Your First Date

first date

A first date can be a cocktail of excitement and nerves. It's the opening chapter in what could be a beautiful love story, yet it's so easy to get swept up in anxiety about making the perfect impression. While there's no one-size-fits-all rule for first dates, certain missteps are commonly made. But don't worry; we've got you covered with some tips to guide you through what not to do on a first date, and help you leave a lasting, positive impression.

Talking Excessively About Yourself

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It's natural to want to share about yourself, but overdoing it can be off-putting. A date should be a two-way conversation, not a monologue. Listen as much as you talk, and show genuine interest in your date's life. Avoid dominating the conversation with endless stories about your achievements or personal life, which can come off as self-absorption.

Discussing Controversial Topics

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While it's important to gauge shared values and beliefs, diving into heavy or controversial topics like politics or religion right away can create unnecessary tension. A first date should be about finding common ground and enjoying each other's company, not debating contentious issues.

Constantly Checking Your Phone

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In our digitally-driven world, it's tempting to glance at your phone. However, constantly checking your phone on a first date is a big no-no. It sends a message that you're disinterested or easily distracted. Give your date your full attention – your notifications can wait.


Overindulging In Alcohol

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It's okay to have a drink to ease the nerves, but overindulging can lead to impaired judgment or behavior that you might regret. Keep your alcohol consumption in check to ensure you're fully present and at your best throughout the date.

Getting Too Personal Too Fast

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Delving into deeply personal or sensitive topics can make your date uncomfortable. Avoid discussions about past relationships, personal financial information, or family issues. Keeping the conversation light and fun will make for a more enjoyable experience for both of you.

Neglecting Your Manners

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Good manners never go out of style. Simple acts like being polite to the waitstaff, saying "please" and "thank you", and practicing good table etiquette make a significant difference. These gestures show respect and thoughtfulness, qualities that are attractive in a potential partner.

Having Unrealistic Expectations

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Approach your first date with an open mind and realistic expectations. Putting too much pressure on the first meeting to be 'perfect' can lead to disappointment. Remember, it's about getting to know someone, not evaluating them for marriage potential from the get-go.

Failing To Listen Actively

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Active listening is crucial on a first date. It's not just about hearing what the other person says but also understanding and responding thoughtfully. This shows that you value their opinions and are engaged in the conversation.


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Dressing Inappropriately

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Your attire says a lot about you. Dressing inappropriately, which can be either too formal or too casual, can give off the wrong impression. Dress smartly but comfortably in a way that reflects your personality and is suitable for the date setting.


Forgetting To Follow Up

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Post-date etiquette is as important as the date itself. Failing to follow up, especially if you're interested, can be mistaken for disinterest. A simple message expressing your enjoyment of the date and interest in meeting again can go a long way.

Final Thoughts


First dates can be daunting, but they're also an opportunity to connect and explore new beginnings. Avoiding these common pitfalls can help ensure that your first impression is a good one. Remember, the key to a successful first date is being your genuine self, showing respect, and enjoying the moment.

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