I would be willing to bet that whoever coined the old phrase “Money can’t buy happiness” had plenty of it in the bank. While it’s true there are plenty of wealthy people out there whose money hasn’t been able to buy them happiness, having a little dough in your pocket never hurts things either.
Many of us probably know at least one person who has money or who comes from money who acts just a little (or a lot) different from all the rest of us poor working class citizens. The users of Reddit stepped up to answer the question, “What's a dead giveaway that someone has come from money?” While some of the answers are pretty obvious (clothes, expensive cars, hobbies) some of the answers are more subtle.
From uncomfortable situations to clueless comments, here are the things that will give those rich people away every single time.
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#25 That's Not A Verb
Using the word "summer" or as a verb. An example would be, "We summered in Monaco last year." That's a dead giveaway.
#24 Why Didn't I Think Of That?
When people say things like "I don't know how anyone can slave away at a desk job." Or "Everyone should travel more!"
Seriously, do you think I'm doing this because it just never occurred to me to be rich?
#23 The Old Switcheroo
I have a friend who asked me to be in his wedding party. I can't say no to that! He's my boy! I was excited!
Then a few weeks later... Surprise! It's a destination wedding in Key West! It felt like a bait and switch.
But he was kind of rubbing his neck while telling us and we all immediately knew it was sort of out of his hands. His fiancé is from money and it's not a problem to her or her friends and family. We knew it was awkward for him because he's been supporting his mother and brother since he was 19 and never had a great life. We didn't make anything out of it out of respect for him and because his fiancé is actually great and we love her.
Honestly, I can swing it, but it just like... felt wrong.
#22 That's Not Normal
A skewed sense of "normal." Like when there was a Food Stamp Challenge a while ago where celebrities tried to live off of an average food stamp budget -- one celebrity spent $29 on things like kale, cilantro, and 7 limes.
When you're really on that tight of a budget, you aren't going to waste money on things like a lime a day and fresh herbs. You're going to try to buy cheap, filling foods like bags of potatoes and mac & cheese.
But even trying to put themselves in that same situation, their sense of what's "normal" is incredibly skewed.
#21 Everything Is Bigger & Better
I was working my first office job with a similarly young IT guy. I bought a toaster for the break room. He asked, "Wow...where did you get the mini-toaster?"
"What do you mean 'mini-toaster'?"
"Yknow....only 2 slots?"
"Wait. You actually think a 4 slot toaster is the standard size and this is somehow smaller than normal?"
"Uh- yeah. That is not a normal toaster."
He remained convinced that I was crazy when I told him my family had never in my life owned a 4 slice toaster. My husband bought me a 4 slicer as a gift to symbolize that we "made it" in life based on this story.
#20 I'll Pay For The Skydiving
"You want to fly to Greece in a few weeks with some of our friends to go skydiving?"
"Can't afford it, thanks though."
"Don't worry, I'll pay for skydiving."
Yeah, that's not what I meant. Not only is the ticket not affordable, I couldn't eat or do anything the whole time and would lose my shit job for being gone on such short notice, thus making me broke and unable to make rent.
His family is insanely wealthy and he married into more money.
#19 As Long As We're Saving You Money
Any time they are in charge of making decisions about something that will cost other people money, they rarely consider cost.
I'm getting married in July. My best friend (whose family is better off than mine ever was) is getting married in June and I am in his wedding party. Without even asking us first, he went out and bought us all $400 suits for the day, and then told us to pay him back. And then, later on, we were told about the specific criteria for shoes and belts (another $140).
His wedding party gift to us? The ties.
Here is an excerpt from his email to us:
What I am going to do is buy all of the suits up front, and you guys can pay me back by e-transfer as soon as you can (I am getting a custom suit that will be similar to yours', and doing it this way will save me a bunch of money on my suit).
So yeah, he made us shell out $400 for our suits so he could get his custom one made cheaper.
#18 Not A Clue
They always act surprised when a person can't afford something or has the cheaper version. It's not callous either, and that's the dead giveaway. They clearly just cannot imagine such a reality.
At least this is what I observed being the poor kid with rich friends (mom was big on the company you keep motto).
An example: my father in law agrees to help fix my trunk and spends the entire time talking about how cheap and crappy my car is. He clearly has zero awareness that it's the most expensive thing I had ever owned.
#17 The Price Is Right?
I come from a working-class family and my boyfriend's parents are both very educated, extremely successful and pretty wealthy.
In the beginning, I remember being in awe of how he would just grab food from the shelves and put it in the cart without looking at the price. He just got the best kind of every item that he wanted and did not compare prices. I pointed this out to him one day and he was found it really interesting. It was just something he had never even thought about (and he is a pretty self-aware, class-conscious guy).
When I was growing up my mom would go food shopping on Friday. Every Thursday night after dinner she would go through the store circulars and clip a big stack of coupons. Each week the grocery list was perfectly added up and totally planned out. We never got anything on a whim. She didn't always buy the cheapest thing per se, because as I got older we weren't poor, but it was very carefully planned because they were extremely conscious of where each and every dollar went.
It's been interesting for me to watch my own habits because for all of my early/mid-20s this was also how I shopped. Now that I've had a steady job for 2.5 years with a good income I am a little less meticulous. It still feels weird, like I should be more careful.
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#16 Now They're Ruined
I went to a boarding school for the first two years of high school. The most shocking thing I witnessed was a boy in my freshman year spilling water on a pair of Gucci loafers he was wearing, going back to his dorm room, THROWS THEM OUT, and puts on another pair. What in the world? They easily cost over $500 and this kid was just dripping with money. As a poor kid, I was astonished by half the stuff I saw there on a daily basis.
#15 Temper, Temper
I went to super prestigious (read: awful) boarding school for my second year of high school, and one of my roommates was a Korean girl who came from a very rich family. She had a fancy Samsung smartphone and a really bad temper, and when things didn't go her way, she'd have a genuine tantrum and smash the phone against the wall.
A day later, she'd be unwrapping a new one that came in the mail. This happened many, many times over.
#14 A Shocking Situation
When they're in shock that I grew up with 4 people and only one bathroom and shower. SO YOU ALL SHARED ONE SHOWER?
#13 It Really Tied The Room Together
Matching furniture/decor, especially if you have accent chairs or furniture that isn't pushed up against a wall which usually means you have lots of space in your home.
My family always bought pieces of furniture as we needed it and would only switch out something if it wasn't working anymore. At that point, functionality outweighed how something might "bring the room together" or "compliment the rug."
#12 Stay Humble
People who travel to impoverished areas for a vacation and then act super self-congratulatory about what they saw. It's a dead giveaway someone comes from money when they have to pay to have a humbling experience in their life.
#11 Just Pick Up The Phone
They think it's weird when people struggle with money.
I used to live in New York City and knew a guy who came from HUGE money who was a trust fund kid and worked in the fashion industry because he loved it. He had an apartment on Park Avenue, had a driver, etc. He was very nice but clueless about struggle. Every time he'd hear me say something like "oh yay, another peanut butter sandwich" he'd just tilt his head and say "If you're hungry why don't you just order delivery?" or something. He had NO CLUE about things like having twenty dollars to your name for the next five days.
#10 What Do You Do For Fun?
Having known quite a number, I'd say hobbies. Things like polo and jumping horses, racing cars, and flying, especially. Golf and other sports that take money to learn/play also to a certain extent. One person into multiple of these is a real giveaway.
#9 The Only Way To Fly
When they ask what's your preferred airline to fly. Ummm whatever gets me to my destination the cheapest way?
#8 It's The Little Things
To me, the big giveaway is people coming to you, rather than you going to them.
My wife and I make a decent middle-class income. We have an accountant, I take my car to a car wash for a wash and wax, my wife gets her nails done, I get a massage every few months, we go to the grocery store, we take our kids to swimming lessons. Normal stuff for people of our income level.
My in-laws fall into the 1% of income ranges. They do all the same stuff, but someone comes to their house to do it. Their accountant comes to them when it's tax season. My mother in law has a regular masseuse who comes to the house every week. A mobile wash and detail service comes to their house and washes and waxes all the cars. During weekdays they have a chef who makes dinner every night and does all their grocery shopping. When my wife's brother was little, the swimming instructor would come to their house to give a private lesson. My father in law's company has a hairstylist on the ground floor, primarily for company employees.
#7 Keep It Clean
When they can not understand why you can't afford a maid to clean your house.
#6 Take It Easy
When someone else is paying the restaurant bill and they order appetizers, a dessert, and drinks.
My family, even to this day, still order the cheapest thing on the menu with water when someone else is paying.
#5 Just Fly There
Always flying to places that are within a days drive and not being able to contemplate that other people will drive more than a few hundred miles to save money.
#4 They Deserve What?
"I don't understand how someone can work a minimum wage job when there is so much opportunity to move up in the world. They deserve minimum wage because they are doing a job that requires minimum skills." I live near a lot of rich people and I've heard this a ton. Kills me every time.
#3 It's All About Perspective
Coming from a working-class family and now living in a wealthier area: Their casual clothes are the kind of garments I'd save up for months to buy and then wear only on special occasions.
#2 You've Gotta Have Priorities
People who have come from, and lived with money all their lives will be weirdly cheap about some things, and willing to spend money on other arbitrary things.
This dude will drop $400 per person on a dinner with fancy food, wine, and tea. But when choosing his car, it's an old beater that he's had for 20 years. He'll spend money to have me come visit because he knows I can't afford the airfare, but then when I arrive he'll drive the 1 1/2 hours to the airport to come get me, rather than spend an extra $100 to get me to an airport closer to his house.
He'll legit spend cash on a taxi to get to a Megabus, which has tables to do his work on, rather than just spend a bit more money on the luxury bus leaving 1 block away from his office, which has enough leg room and space for his laptop.
We'll go out to dinner, and he'll not only cover the cost of food, but also wine, and my transport to get there. But then, when it's time to book a round-trip flight from place A to place B, he'll search out the absolute cheapest fare possible, rather than use the most convenient airport and he'll end up spending an extra $50 each way on the taxi fare to the airport. He can afford the extra $100 for the closer to him airport but it's the principle of the thing (I think?).
He'll drop $200 on drinks at the nightclub but will only buy cheap vodka for at home drinking. He'll spend $500 on wine from a winery but will go to the local store and only buy Yellowtail.
I started to realize that for the most part, wealthy people are more about experiences than the actual cost. Then when the experience isn't that important, will try to cheap out HARD.
#1 It's Not So Simple
Minimalism. It is a luxury that is indulged in only by the relatively well off. Wealthy people can downsize, purge, and "live simply" knowing full well that they can always buy anything they might need. When you're poor you always have to second guess yourself when you're getting rid of something. If it turns out you needed it, after all, you probably won't be able to just buy another one at the drop of a hat.
