Like the mystical unicorn, leprechaun and Bigfoot, teenage girls are a mystery. They seem untouchable, travel in packs and when it comes to speaking to them, forget about it. They'll probably give you a blank stare and walk away. So how do you actually become friends with one? Why are they so confusing? These current and past teenage guys share what irks them most about high school girls.
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#1 Chatting Circles
How they could form a magical, impenetrable barrier with a chatting-circle.
#2 Giggling
What confused me the most? The giggles... Yes, the giggles of teenage girls confused me the most. Walking into class, or down the hallway and a group of three or four girls would just start giggling and snickering to themselves like some sort of bad inside joke. I would always check my shoes or clothing for something embarrassing but never found anything. To be honest, I'll probably never understand the giggles...
#3 Feuds
How they can argue for literally three minutes and hate each other for the whole year.
#4 This Conversation
“You should ask Amy out!”
“She likes me?”
“Totally. She talks about you all the time and you two would be great together.”
“Hi, Amy. Want to go out to the movies Friday?”
“Um, okay. But just so you know I only think of you as a friend.”
#5 Bathroom Squad
Why the toilet their gang hideout.
#6 No Interest
The girls never showed any interest. Fast forward to the 40-year reunion and all these girls are telling me how much they were crushing on me in high school. I left town right after high school to find greener pastures. College was a completely different story. I guess the girls there didn't have their old cliques so they were more aggressive.
#7 Want Older Guys
They all wanted older guys, like three to four years older.
#8 They Don't Talk
Why don't you tell us why you're mad/what's wrong so I can help or apologize?
#9 Flirty by Nature?
Are you flirty by nature? Actually interested in me? Or just being friendly?
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#10 Odd Conversations
Me, in high school, driving around with some friends of a friend because I didn't know any better and the two girls had rocks in their brains but fantastic butts. We've all been there. One of them is moaning about some boyfriend for at least 15 minutes, without pausing for breath. Finally, she gets to the end of her rant... there's about 10 seconds of silence... "So do you think I should get back together with him?" WHAT!
#11 Acting Nice
How they can act super nice, then one thing goes wrong, and they are mortal enemies all of a sudden.
#12 Hot Guys
How openly and often they talk about hot guys. Maybe once I talked with my male friends about a girl, but I would always hear them talk about “so and so is so hot.” Not to say girls are like bad people or whatever, they're just more open about that stuff. One time, I was snowboarding with two of my female friends and one was staying in the lodge because she wasn’t feeling too good. While me and my other friend are out on the hill we get an “emergency” text telling us to get right down to the chalet. When we get there, it turns out it was just two hot dudes.
#13 Where Are They Hiding?
I was an antisocial quiet kid at an all-boys school. For me, it was mainly where on earth all my classmates were getting girlfriends from. Having barely any friends as a kid is fun.
#14 Insecurity and Horomones
I went to a small school so we all knew each other but around the time we became teens I noticed that the girls became way more hateful and just all-out mean in the things they'd say. Even the ones I was good friends with did it. I came to find out insecurity and hormones ran rampant in my school.
#15 They're Gods
You could be their biggest crush and you may think they don’t even know your name.
#16 They All Have Boyfriends
How darn near every girl has a boyfriend, but darn near every guy is single.
#17 Being Touchy Feely
How they are just kind of casually gay. They just walk up to their friend grab their butt or boobs and then just segue into whatever they have to say. I don't get it.
#18 Popular Guys Only
Girls in my school only seemed to be interested in the “popular guys” and it just baffled me. They could be really ugly, zero personality, or just straight-up dumb, but as long as they were in the football team (our team was really good) they had all the influence over the girls in our school.
#19 Why There Are So Many
Why, in a class of 50 people, 35 of whom were girls, I was the only guy who couldn't get a prom date.
#20 Afraid of Gym Balls
Being afraid of the ball in gym class. Like, literally huddling together in groups of girls and then shrieking in utter terror when the soft playground ball flies 30 feet over your head. Why? Why did they do this?
#21 Missing
Where are they? I was in a super religious all-male school.
#22 Compliments, Compliments
#23 Mixed Signals
I can't tell if the relationship they want is platonic or not. She slapped my butt but then pretended it never happened. Sits on me and then pretends it never happened. Mixed signals???
#24 Constant Drama
How they just make a drama out of small things to keep themselves entertained.
#25 Not Untouchable
I never understood that they were just people that I could have talked to.
#26 Talking to Them is Hard
"Girls are not special magical unicorns. They're people, just like you and your friends. Talk to them like you would anyone else." Then I did. Boy howdy, they got mad.
#27 Separate Swimsuits
I was confused for the longest time on why two-piece swimsuits, top and bottom, were sold separately. Also for like $60 each.
#28 Hints on Hints
The most confusing thing is all the hints they drop. Just tell me, please!
#29 What Do They Want?
Whether they were playing hard to get, shy or just not interested.
#30 Feeding Egos
What confuses me the most is how on every girl's post on social media, all the girls seem to call them hot even if they just barely know each other.
#31 The Ones Who Love Horses
How all the girls who love horses are complete psychos, and none of the sane girls spare a passing thought about those stupid short giraffes.
#32 Why Girls Can't Ask Guys Out
Why girls can’t ask guys out. Why do they have to make you know that they’re into you, but do it so confusingly that you don’t know. Until you bump into them a few years later and they ask you why you never asked them out.
#33 Toilet Groups
Why do they need to go to the toilet in groups? Like, I would not be able to use the toilet if someone was in there watching me.
#34 Taking Showers Together
Why they always seemed so willing to be gay with each other... I can name (minimum) five girls that are willing/have taken a shower with another girl. Both proclaimed heterosexuals. Both swore they weren’t gay. Just hanging out being gal pals, taking fully nude showers with each other. You can imagine how much that frustrated my sad 14-year-old self.
#35 I Like You, Nevermind
How come I got a call after a dance that a girl liked me, but I hear a week later while buying lunch tickets that she wanted to break up with me.
#36 Want to be Friends?
Why, when I came out as gay, they all suddenly wanted to be my friend.
#37 Why Dating is a Big Deal
How people make dating such a big deal, and how they can’t ask a guy out. Why is it expected that we have to?
#38 They Bully
The girls at my middle school bullied this one girl until they basically drove her to attend private schooling. The girls, once caught, just made a scene by hysterically crying. Pretty sure nothing happened. It was wild.
#39 Why They Aren't Attractive
The fact that, despite my best efforts, I just couldn’t find them attractive like all the other guys did. In hindsight, it’s because I’m gay, but I hadn’t figured it out at that point in time.
#40 Being Fake
How they would hate each other's guts and talk behind each other's backs but as soon as they meet up, hugs and kisses and small talk... Like, what? You two are not gaining anything from keeping this up. Why bother?
#41 Booty Shorts
Why the heck do they wear booty shorts in winter, like, I get you are trying to look hot, but there's snow on the ground for God's sake!
#42 Hugging Rules
Girls hug each other and friends who are boys. Girls hug boys they like. Boys are supposed to know the difference. I did not. I still do not. Luckily, I’m happily married because I still don’t understand how to “flirt” and stuff with girls despite people telling me I have done that.
#43 They Change Their Mind
How they can one day flirt with you and the next they don’t want to even see you.
#44 Two-Faced
How they can talk badly about someone behind their back but be their best friend to their face.
#45 The Solution
Do they go out of their way to spend time with you? Do they go out of their way to have physical contact with you (smacking you on the arm, playful shoving, messing with your hair or stealing items of clothing like hats)? That’s all flirting. Do they flush bright red and start looking everywhere but you when they’re talking to you? They might be shy and like you. Is she giving you all of the excuses to never hang out? Is she flirting with other people in front of you? Is she giving you none of the signals above? She probably isn’t into you.
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