June 27, 2023 | Melissa Budish

People Share The Unwritten "Guy Codes" And "Girl Codes" They Always Follow


In this life, there are some rules that must be followed at all costs. Such rules are unwritten, but generally, people will discover them as they enter adulthood. Following these "guy codes" and "girl codes" are important because they represent the basic and minimum requirements of being a decent human being. Without such codes, society would just crumble into a black hole of social chaos. People from around the world shared the unwritten "guy codes" and "girl codes" they always follow. Do you agree with what they had to say? Keep reading and judge for yourself:

couple holding hand front of body of calm water with mountain distanceUnsplash/andriklangfield

Don't forget to check the comment section below the article for more interesting stories!

#1 That Bro Life

Should a bro lose his life in a weight-lifting related accident, a bro will add at least 100 lbs to the bar before reporting the incident. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve done this for bros. Happens more times than you think. I'd be like, "Weird he was attempting to curl 120s but he only weighs 140."

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#2 Keeping Score Is Tacky

Be generous with your closest friends. Buy them an occasional drink or their favorite soft drink without "keeping score" of whose turn it is to pay.  I make a lot more money than my best friend. We don't talk about it and I never throw anything in his face, but if I want to go to a baseball game with him or take a road trip he knows that "not being able to afford it" doesn't have to be a reason for not going. He's my bro and I've got him covered.

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#3 Paying It Forward

A buddy and I always run under the assumption that we owe each other some general amount of money. Not a dollar-by-dollar log, but just... money. So if we need a bit of help buying food, we're just like "Hey, get this for me." Which perpetuates the "I probably owe you something around this price" mentality and keeps it going.

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#4 Good Looking Out

If another lady walks past and you notice a spot on the back of their pants or skirt, tell them, but do it discreetly. Recently, I noticed a passenger had a spot on her pants. I wrote her a note and slipped it to her as I was collecting trash from the carriage. A half-hour later, I saw her again and she had a different pair of pants on. She was super thankful.

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#5 Lessons From The Bronx Tale

If somebody loans me money it's my job to remember to pay back, not theirs to collect. I once heard a saying: "If you loan somebody money and never hear from them again, consider it money well spent." I think the quote is from The Bronx Tale. It makes me feel better about a pretty good sum of money I'm never seeing again.

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#6 Directional Nods

Upwards nod = We're friends and I'm acknowledging you.

Downwards nod = I don't know you but I acknowledging you.

This is so true to the point where if you reverse it on accident, you won’t get acknowledged. I was extremely tired and broke the code by upward nodding to a stranger and they looked at me confused. They just walked away without giving me a nod. It took me until I got home to realize my mistake.

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#7 Ignore Him

If a girl needs a brush, chapstick, a hair tie or a tampon, you are immediately obligated to supply her with it if you have it. If a girl has pockets in her dress, you must always compliment her on the pockets on her dress. If you see another girl looking upset, scared or uncomfortable because some dude is trying too hard and being creepy, you jump in the conversation like she’s your best friend and make up some story to get them away without an explanation. “Look what I found, come here,” And you also completely ignore the guy.

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#8 Quick Reference

Guy Code: 1) Don't try to get with someone else's partner. 2) Always give at least one space for urinals. 3) Head nod. In reference to the third code: we got some new neighbors recently and he just stares in disgust as if you insulted him whenever you nod at him. I've tried down nod, up nod, and even verbally said hello a couple of times. All he does is stare like an idiot. I think we're going to fight soon.

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#9 Frat Logic

Actually, at my brother's frat, they had a special rule: If a brother's girl comes on to you, you hook up with her and then tell him immediately. The idea was that he might not trust your judgment that she was flirting too much. You had to be sure she meant to be unfaithful to him. I always thought that was pretty messed up.

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#10 Just Be Prepared

If your friends help you move, you are expected to 1) be packed already, and B) provide pizza and drinks. I hate how many times I've shown up to help friends move and they have nothing packed with not enough boxes. What should take a couple of hours turns into an all-day marathon.

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#11 Even Your Worst Enemy

My girlfriend was telling me last night that she always carries an extra pad or tampon because you’ll never know when another woman may need one. She said it’s an unwritten rule for women that even if you hate the person you will give them one if they need it. It got me thinking about what other unwritten rules have I not heard of.

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#12 Look Out For Your Girls

Girl Code: if something is fixable within five minutes (make-up, something stuck in teeth, small things on appearance) you tell her and help her if needed. If it isn't fixable on the spot, you keep your mouth shut and ESPECIALLY don't point it out to others. Bless the girl I didn't even know in high school who told me I'd spotted through my pink skirt. I wore a jacket around my waist for the rest of the day, which is better than being exposed. We weren't friends but she didn't let me suffer it out. I hope she's having a nice life.

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#13 Universal Code

The last slice of pizza or pop always goes to who paid for it. If you all chipped in, you don't have to ask, but you have to tell. And never take both in the same hangout, no matter what the earlier rules say. Never mess with the music in another person's car. I don't care HOW bad you think their taste is. If you know someone else had a regrettable hookup... No, you don't. Not even if you fall out and become enemies. You don't remember.

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#14 Pub Rules

No, haven't seen him at the pub. That's a general rule. But I also went to a pub once that had a sign saying something like: "Tips are the difference between 'Oh yeah he's always in here' and 'Who is your husband again? No, never seen him'" I thought that was hilarious.

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#15 Legally Blonde Told Us

I only had one chance to exercise this girl code rule, but one time, I was passing a girl in the lobby of a building and she told me that she had just gotten a straight perm and was waiting for the rain to pass before she went outside. So I let her share my umbrella for four to five blocks while we walked to a bus stop together. I would do that for any woman if it happened again. Perms are $200. They can take up to three hours and are ruined if you get them wet within 48 hours of having the procedure done.

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#16 It's A Two-Way Deal First

If you sell a buddy a car (or anything of value) cheaper than normal because they are a friend, that friend must offer to sell it back to you before offering it to the general public. My grandpa gave me a car and when my brother needed a car I gave it to him. When my sister needed a car he gave it to her. When it needed brakes and exhaust work she took it to the junkyard and kept the money. I'm still bitter. That car had enormous sentimental value. It was a 1990 Oldsmobile, ninety-eight. It was so cool. Ugh.

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#17 Obligatory Summation

Unless you are asked and willing to provide further details, keep remarks about the time you spent with someone vague and borderline childish. Example: you’ve spent a night with your girlfriend. Your description and summation of all the events of that night can be stated as “I got some.”

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#18 Never Kiss And Tell

I've always abided by "A gentleman never kisses and tells" and even with my closest friends have usually tried to keep things in broad strokes. But in my experience, most women tend not to abide and will go into minute detail about ALL OF IT.

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#19 Weird Milk Experience

You absolutely never share a glass of milk with another man. I had a weird experience with this dude. We were both kids; maybe 13 or so. I went to his house to show him some PC games. I made some copies for him. He wanted to share a glass of milk. I said no. I really don't like milk much, and I only have it when I'm eating cookies. He saw some movie where some kid with a venereal disease would use the milk to test if someone else was scared of getting the disease from him. I noped out of there. I don't know if he had a disease or not, but the kid was freaking weird.

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#20 Wives Over Bros

A guy I know is getting married soon and his bachelor party was supposed to be last weekend. Well, his best man couldn't make it as it was two weeks before his wife's due date (which everybody knew about before the groom picked the date). The groom told off the best man and uninvited him from the wedding because he chose his wife and possibly the birth of his (first) child instead of camping along a river while getting tipsy.

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#21 Unwritten Sisterhood

If you see another girl in an uncomfortable situation, you try to get her out of there or at least let her know that you got her back. I've done it for everyone—my sister, my friends, and my friends' moms. One time at a school event, my best friend's mom somehow ended getting an unsolicited massage from another parent with boundary issues and I quickly made an excuse up that I needed help at the concession stand. No one is too old or too young to do this! On the more lighthearted side, in my experience, when you hug another girl, you always try to slot the boobs by going slightly to the side so that you don't just mash your chests together and hurt someone.

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#22 Distracting The Defenses

"Thou shalt never hold a bro's wingman duties against him" When you're chatting up a girl, I don't care how unattractive the friend he's flirting with is, or how bad his flirting technique is... When he's distracting the air defenses to give you a clear run at the target, you do not insult his flying.

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#23 Sandwich Rule

Girl Code: When another girl asks how she looks and you have something negative to point out, do it gently and follow up with at least one or more positive. You gotta use the sandwich. Compliment, insult, and then compliment.

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#24 Mandatory Encouragement

As a guy that lifts weights and has brought some of his other male (and two female friends) into the fold— you never, EVER, slander another person's weight on any lift. If your friend is 250 pounds and only benches 135 but is trying his best, then you never make a sound other than howling intense encouragement at them. The rule in my basement is: everything is heavy to SOMEBODY. As long as you're giving it your all, then the number is irrelevant.

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#25 Silence, Always

Silence at the urinal, man. I will not speak to you unless I require immediate medical attention and you appear to be a doctor. If possible, I will take a urinal at least one urinal away from anyone else, and select spacing to maximize the number of potential guys who needn't stand shoulder-to-shoulder.

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#26 A Single Intervention

Guy Code: If your tipsy bro is about to be unfaithful to his girlfriend, you must follow through with one intervention. If he says he doesn't care, you did your part and are free from any responsibility. One time, my friend tried to stop me from being unfaithful to my girlfriend...with my girlfriend. A bunch of us were at a social gathering and I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to grab dinner afterward. My friend pulled me aside and reminded me that I have a girlfriend, and I told him, "Yeah, dude. This is her." He had met her before, and none of us were drinking or otherwise impaired, so I'm not sure why he was confused.

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#27 Expectations For Friends

Lightly picking on each other is a sign of endearment, but you should always be trying to build each other up.

Don't put someone else down just to make yourself look or feel better.

Everyone wants to feel important and the center of attention sometimes.

Don't get intimate someone that your friends are deeply invested in, even if it's not going to go anywhere.

...I wish I had friends who followed any of these.

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#28 Rule For Every Girl

Not every girl follows this code but should. When you see a woman in need of help because somebody won't leave her alone, you either tell someone or step in as her 'best friend' and persuade the person to go. Women also just know to go to the bathroom together. For opinions on appearance, to gossip briefly, or just for safety reasons.

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#29 Bros 4 Lyfe

Don't hold grudges against your bros. Just tell him to off once, then move the heck on. On the other hand, if you did something to your bro, say sorry and buy him drinks (first part optional). Then don't make that same mistake again.

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#30 A True Wingman

I will wingman any man. I don't even have to know you. Heck, I'll wingman any woman too. If you are trying to make an impression on someone you think you'll hit it off with, call me. I love making love happen and I am always willing to help people.

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#31 A Phrase Of Trust

People who end a sentence with man, dude, or (my personal favorite) brother are immediately trusted. It's like a secret handshake that says, "At the very least, we are not enemies."

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#32 Scuff Awareness

This is going to sound weird as a guy code thing as it’s actually a bro thing to do for women: If I happen to be walking somewhere at night (think grocery store parking lot), and I’m behind a woman, I always scuff my feet or something so that she doesn’t get freaked out by a man popping out of nowhere. As a fast walker, I will usually also slow my pace so she doesn’t think I’m trying to gain on her or anything. Women’s lives are filled with these safety-related mini panic attacks, and as a guy, I try to do my best to not cause them.

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#33 Escape Escort

If a girl throws up or passes out from drinking, no guy will touch her. Even if it means I have to glue myself to her for the rest of the night. If you have a tampon and someone says they need one, you hand it over no exceptions. If a guy is imposing himself on a girl physically, you are obliged to rudely squeeze yourself between them and help her escape.

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#34 Have Their Back

Have your boy's back in an altercation, fight, or argument. I'm not saying 100% of the time step up for them, sometimes people do dumb things and deserve the consequences. But if the need arises, you should have their back. Even if it just means stepping up beside them to look intimidating.

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#35 Life Motto: Don't Be A Jerk

I just go by "human code." If you look homeless and hungry I will buy you some food. If you drop something I'll help you pick it up even if you didn't need help. I will always let one person cut in front of me in merging traffic. If you start telling a story in a group and everyone starts talking over you, I will say, "And then what happened?" and listen even if no one else is. I always leave a public bathroom cleaner than I found it. My life motto is don't be a jerk. It doesn't matter what gender.

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#36 Hair Ties For All

If I hear a girl say she needs a hair tie, I will immediately hand one over, even if I’ll only have one left for myself. I also carry a ridiculous amount of bobby pins for similar purposes.

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#37 Guy Code Or Fragile Masculinity?

The guy code rules for eating a banana: 1) Never make direct eye contact with another man while eating a banana. 2) Never close your eyes while biting the banana. 3) Never take a bite longer than 1" in length. 4) Never take more than one second to bite the banana. 5) Never let your lips touch the banana.

1280px-Magician_Kyle_Marlett_eating_a_bananaWikimedia Commons

#38 Dating Code

The ultimate dating code: Take your age, divide it by 2 and add 7. This method gives you the minimum age you can date a guy or a girl. Works 100% of the time 90% of the time.

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#39 Keep Your Eyes To Yourself

Never admit to checking out someone’s girlfriend or spouse. This just happened to me. My husband and I went on vacation with another couple. We all got tipsy and my husband's friend goes, “Dang bro, your girl is looking fine! My wife could learn something from her!” They laughed, but this was not something you say to two women in bathing suits. Geez. Uncomfortable all around.

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#40 Tell. Her.

If you see a girl with her skirt tucked into her tights, tissue stuck to her shoe or lipstick on her teeth, TELL HER. This happened once in college when I was working retail. I was leaving the store's restroom and one of my coworkers, who was always a nasty witch to me for whatever reason, had tucked her skirt into her underwear. I debated whether or not to say anything and then went with my gut and alerted her of the situation. She was clearly surprised and reacted super pleasantly towards me despite our history. She was always super nice to me after that.

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#41 Eyes Forward

Eyes forward, no talking at the urinal. Pass by someone you know in the public restroom? A nod of acknowledgment, nothing more. Maybe a grunt to accompany it or a "Hey" if the jerk decides he's not going to follow those rules.

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#42 A Gift, Not A Loan

When you lend a friend or family member money, welcome but don't expect a payback. Look at it as a gift, rather than a loan. The alternative to this would be to never loan money to friends or family.

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#43 Eat Like A Vacuum

You're only ever one slice ahead of the last man. I eat like a vacuum so the amount of times I have to wait for someone to grab a slice before I can is unruly. We all paid $7, I'm not getting $14 worth of pizza unless you're full as heck.

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#44 No Narcissism Allowed

Men can closely examine themselves in the restroom mirror but only if no other men are currently in there too. Soon as someone walks in, pretend like you were just leaving.

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#45 No Ex-Flames

I'm engaged now, but when I was single, I refused to ever get even slightly involved with a guy one of my girlfriends had been romantically involved with in the past. Even if my friend claimed it "wasn't a big deal" or that she is fine with it. I know that at the end of the day–if you truly care about friendship—you won't go after their ex-flames. Even if the two were never "official."

 


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