Women are well within their rights to turn down someone’s advances. However, polite as someone may be, the rejectee doesn’t always take it well. In fact, some people take rejection quite hard and make the situation worse than it needed to be. These people share stories of just how bad a person can take a simple “no.”
#1 Prison Sentence
My current girlfriend has a six-inch cut on her left thigh after her ex-boyfriend went after her in an attempt to prevent her from leaving. As they argued, she fought like crazy and managed to actually get him off of her. She then alerted the authorities and her ex is now serving a seven-year prison sentence.
#2 Student Files
Someone once said to me, "I have access to the student files. I know where you live.” A few weeks went by and there were reports of a guy looking into windows around my neighborhood. Thank God he got caught before it escalated into a home invasion or worse. He was a student and I suspect he was lying about having access to the files because how could he? But it's still scary that even though he didn't find my house, he was close enough for it to be a terrifying coincidence.
#3 Delivery System
My ex-boyfriend was working at a pizza place in the small town we both lived in. He texted me that he found my new address through their delivery system. Whether or not that was true, I still screenshotted his messages and sent them to his manager. Needless to say, he was fired. I was honestly more annoyed than scared when it happened. I've since moved and thinking back on it it really creeps me out.
#4 Online Dating
Some guy on a dating site once messaged me a few times, but I told him I wasn't interested. After the third time he messaged me, I asked him not to send me anything else. He then threatened to track me down and hurt me. He was also old enough to be my father as well, so on top of everything else, there's that.
#5 No For an Answer
I was 13 at the time and I remember basically telling this really old dude to leave me alone. This all happened while he was stopped at a light, shouting a bunch of stuff at me. Then the light went green. He sped off, U-turned wildly, then came speeding back toward me. He then threatened that he was going to hurt me.
Then there was another guy at a concert I went to once. Again, he was someone else who didn't take no for an answer. He pinned me against the wall and only scurried away because the police crashed the concert at nearly the same moment. The worst one about that was my friends just watching it happen, doing nothing.
#6 Locked Door
I remember a time when this one guy managed to break into my house and actually chase me into my bedroom. I made it there in time and locked the door behind me. He then spent ten minutes shouting through my locked bedroom door that I should come out and have a reasonable conversation with him, adult to adult.
#7 Work Study Partner
I got the old you’re-actually-a-dumb-woman-who-I-didn’t-like-anyway after he wrote a letter expressing his feelings about me. I politely told him that he showed a lot of courage, but I just wanted to be friends. The worst part was that he was my work study partner. I was 19 years old. Looking back, I should have contacted my boss who would have done something about the work partnership.
#8 Bag of Presents
I finally managed to dump my emotionally harmful ex for the last time. A couple of weeks later, he found out I was staying at my mom’s. One night, he hid in the bushes in her garden and waited for her to go to bed so he could knock on my window and give me a bag full of presents. Six months later, his mom called me and asked when I was going to put him out of his misery and get back together with him because he was becoming unbearably depressed. It’s literally been six months of absolutely no contact, why are you all still waiting?!
#9 The Bookstore
When I was a nanny, I was walking around with the baby in the pram and we visited a bookshop. A man started talking to me and then asked me out. I was very kind, keeping my father's advice in mind about being kind when I have to reject men. I said that that was a nice offer, but my boyfriend might not be too keen on it.
His response to that was to lean in and try and kiss me. I told him to get the heck off of me and he then exploded with rage and started screaming in my face. I was thankfully saved by the bookstore employee. The man stormed out of the shop, but I spent the next few hours shaking like a leaf. What a champion.
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#10 Sister’s Husband
My sister’s husband took her life when she tried to leave him. She didn’t pass instantly and he sat next to me in the ICU, crying crocodile tears. He was also telling me what a terrible woman she was. The story he gave the police was that she did it to herself. She was in a cast to her fingertips from the broken arm he gave her. I have no faith in the police. I know many are good people, but not there and not then. Thankfully, he's gone now, too. The world is better off. I was scared it was only a matter of time until he hurt someone else.
#11 So You Know
He sent me an email with a three-page essay attached. It was written entirely in third person, recounting his first rejection by a girl named Tania at the age of 16. The story eventually ended with him harming himself bad enough to slip into a coma. He was then hospitalized and eventually recuperated. He then told poor Tania that she could avoid his and his parents’ pain by agreeing to date him. The email said, "So you know what you are getting into."
I was 19 and didn’t see this extreme level of crazy coming. But, I knew I needed to really make how I felt clear. I immediately called him to reiterate that I did not want to be with him. I also told him that I no longer wanted to be friends with him and if he contacted me again, I would change my number. I let a friend of his know what was going on as well.
Five days later, he called from a different number to tell me he was out in the country and would hurt himself if I didn’t agree to date him. I lied and convinced him I had to leave because I had a family emergency, but we would talk the next day. I had a mutual friend call him and report back to me that he was lying about being in the country.
He called the next day and with the most sing-song creepy tone. He said, "You think you're so nice. What type of human being doesn't agree to what someone needs when they tell you they're going to hurt themselves?” I lost it and told him I was changing numbers. I said the police would be involved the next time he contacted me. He just laughed the whole time and told me he hoped I would live alone, like I deserved.
There was radio silence for a whole six years until I got married. I then received an email from him, out of the blue. He wrote, "Hey! Wow, it's been a while! How are you? Would be so great to catch up sometime :)" What an unbelievable psycho. Obviously I never replied to him and then changed my email, again!
#12 Lackluster First Date
I also once had a guy send me hundreds of text messages calling me all kinds of names, cursing me out and threatening me. He did it because I didn't go to bed with him after our entirely lackluster (first and last) date. I didn't even bother reading beyond the first 50. I just let him go on and on until I blocked and mass-deleted. Still, it was nuts.
#13 Opening Night
There was once this older guy I was working a film festival with. On the opening night, he said something along the lines of, “You know, there's something between us.” When I ignored what he said, he started loudly repeating how he wished he'd brought his girlfriend. He was very clearly just trying to save face.
#14 Popular Guy
I turned down a guy that was known for being the “popular guy.” I thought he was a bit of a jerk, though. When he tried to kiss me, I turned my head the other way, said I wasn't interested and walked off. He grabbed my hand and said I missed the best opportunity in my life. He then said the only reason he tried to kiss me was because he pitied me.
#15 What're You Wearing?
Me and this one guy went on one date, but I declined a second. A couple of days after that, he called me and told me what I had been wearing that day. This kind of behavior went on for a couple of months. I'd literally never see him, but at least three times a week, he'd know exactly what I was wearing that day.
#16 Gas Station
I went into a gas station to get my mom some lottery tickets and the cashier asked for my ID. While holding my ID, he questioned my marital status and other personal details. I told him I wasn’t interested and paid. He gave me my ID back. I went to the car, started it up and began to tell my little sister what happened as she was waiting in the car.
She then started yelling that someone was coming over. The cashier was tapping my window and yelling “Are we friends?” I put the car in reverse and drove away. While I don’t know for certain who did it, the next day I had my tire slashed. I was told that it seemed intentional. As a precaution, I had some of my male friends go by and tell him to leave me alone. I never went back to that gas station and didn’t have any issues with the guy after that. The worst part was I was 18 and when I told my mom what happened, she didn’t believe me.
#17 “You’re Mesmerizing!”
When I worked in retail, there was a creepy guy who came in to send a fax. He started saying weird stuff then started coming to the copy center multiple times a week. I was 18 and had no idea how to handle it. So, I started hiding when he came in (which all of my managers and co-workers supported). I found out the hard way that he worked at the gas station across the street. I went in to pay for gas once and as I was leaving, he literally screamed, "You're mesmerizing!" Luckily my managers never let me leave the building alone and I never saw him again. But, it was scary.
#18 Ticketing Agent
Once, a ticketing agent kept my ID for a really long time. He then came on the plane as we boarded to say he had my number and asked if it was okay to text me. I didn't even know they could get on the plane. I didn't know how to say no to the employee, but I told him I had a boyfriend. When I got into the gate in a different city, he was waiting there for me. I wasn't as creeped out as I probably should have been, but I never got hurt or anything.
#19 Not Clear Enough
When I was 15, there was a 17-year-old guy in my neighborhood who I met through mutual friends. He had dropped out of high school, so we didn't go to school together. But, he found out where I lived and would knock on my door to ask if I could hang out. He never really did anything to scare me, but I knew he wanted to hang out because he liked me. I wasn’t allowed to hang out alone with guys and wasn't even allowed to "let a boy pursue me," so I got in trouble for it. My stepdad would ground me when he'd come knocking and my mom said it was my fault for, "obviously not making it clear enough that I wasn't that kind of girl."
#20 Gym Class
I'm a gym nut. I go at least five times a week and train for around two hours — either in the weight room, or with teachers during some courses I like. I was in this room with some other people and a teacher, doing boot camp style training. There was also this guy, who's clearly not right in the head. I don't know what he has precisely, but it's pretty evident that he's not functioning "normally."
He also has epilepsy and has had a seizure during fitness class before. Nobody really talks to this guy, but I try to be kind to him. I greet him when I see him, talk to him about training, just small talk. Apparently he took it as flirting. I was appalled at the way other women blatantly ignored him, but now I know why.
Just before class, he came up to me and said, "Finally I've learned at what times you come to the gym!" Uh, creepy. But, I chalked it up to his less-than-average social skills. During class, though, he started wanting to be paired up with me. He tried to help me (even though I'm way more fit) with lifting and constantly invaded my space. When he broke the touch barrier, I had enough. I sternly told him that he was being inappropriate. The instructor saw what was happening, took him aside, and prevented him from bothering me again.
After I rejected his advances and the teacher moved him to another part of the room, he faked a seizure. At first, he was kind of believable and we called the owner of the gym. But then he stopped "seizing" long enough to tell me, "You see? This is all your fault.” Then he resumed, far less convincingly. I've never seen anything as cringeworthy and sad.
#21 Six-Bed Hostel
I was backpacking with my girlfriend (we’re both women) and staying in a hostel. It was a six-bed mixed dorm. All was well until it was just me, my girlfriend and an old guy in the room who was way too partied out. We ordered pizza that night and he started shouting at us for not ordering him pizza in the common room. He then started telling people he wanted to marry my girlfriend and asked me if he could marry her.
We went to bed eventually, but he kept talking about how much he liked my girlfriend. I asked him to stop because he was making her uncomfortable. I also repeatedly said, “Go to sleep.” He didn’t, but he proceeded to start making obscene gestures. I was bottom bunk and my girlfriend was the top bunk. It was horrible. My girlfriend threw a bottle of water at his head and we both ran out of the room to go to the reception desk.
He followed us. We had to complain about him while he stood there. He flipped out. He threatened to hurt us both and said he would injure the guy on reception. He kept saying, “Why would I do that over you? You’re disgusting.” The hostel kicked him out and gave us a private room. But, he stayed and argued for hours. Even the police had to come.
#22 Phone Rejection
He was 15 at the time. Although the rejection happened over the phone, he was so irate that he illegally drove a car to the nearest place by my house (I'd once told him I lived near the hospital). He then waited there demanding I give him more accurate directions to my house. In retrospect, I probably should have been more terrified than I was.
#23 Not Receptive
I’d gone out with a guy once that I’d met through a dating site and we just didn’t click. I told him exactly that. I was very respectful of his feelings and wished him the best. He was not receptive. He called me names, told me that he was going to find where I lived, just really awful things. He wouldn’t stop texting me horrible stuff about how I was “leading him on.” I blocked his number, which thankfully stopped the messages. I also reported him on the dating app and thankfully never heard from him again. It was legit one of the scariest things.
#24 Uber Pool
A guy asked me out during an uber pool ride. I told him I wasn't interested, but he started moving closer. He kept asking why I wasn't interested and what was wrong with him. It was… uncomfortable. My uber driver, for some reason, thought it was hilarious to see me pressed against the door to try and get away from this random guy invading my personal space.
#25 City Street
This one guy chased my car down a major city street as I drove away. He was running after me until he collapsed on the road. He then called me dozens of times, eventually blaming everyone from my little brother to my dentist for breaking us up. He then flew to his hometown the next day and took his life. His extreme clinginess and jealousy was the reason for my decision to “take a break,” and though clearly I made the right decision, I felt terribly guilty for years.
#26 Fifth Grade
I was in the fifth grade when all of this happened. But, some acquaintance of mine once walked up to me and confessed that he liked me. When I rejected him, he actually struck me. He then started harassing me and my younger brother until my best friend (who I’m still friends with to this day) beat him up for bothering us.
#27 Passing Notes
I was in the sixth grade when a boy slipped me a note, asking me out on a date with him. I told him that I wasn’t interested in him. He then proceeded to cut a piece of my hair while he was sitting at the desk behind me. The good news is that he got suspended and was thankfully moved to a different classroom.
#28 Keeping a List
I know that a lot of guys pump out manifestos when they’ve been rejected. I dealt with something similar. I once rejected a guy who sent me a list of every single time he so much as talked to a girl and she turned him down. It was next to their names and the dates when it happened. He then said I’d be added to the list if I didn’t go out with him. Weirdo.
#29 Overstaying His Welcome
I was spending time with an ex because he insisted he needed the company and we were still on friendly terms. I ended up having to kick him out of my house because he was acting crazy. He spent the following three days sleeping outside of my house and only left to get suitcases of his stuff, which he subsequently left by my back door. He would repeat this routine every few months until I moved, insisting that he would hold my bike hostage until I "let him into my house.” Needless to say, he never set foot in my home again.
#30 Spreading Rumors
In high school, I turned a guy down, so he went around spreading rumors that he tried to sleep with me but couldn’t because I had problems. He spent the rest of the year talking smack about how nasty I was, unclean, unshaven, etc. About five years ago, he tried to add me on Facebook and I blocked him. I hate that guy.
#31 Going Crazy
When I broke up with my first boyfriend, he went crazy. He threatened himself, locked himself in the bathroom, etc. I had his mom calling me every night for a week saying he’d locked himself in the bathroom. She had the nerve to blame it all on me. Thankfully, my mom set them both straight and the only time I heard from him again was about a year later when he came to a hangout spot. He came in with his new girlfriend to try and make me jealous. He then got jealous when I was talking to a friend who looks like a Viking. Quite pathetic really.
#32 Dating a Co-Worker
I went on a terrible date with a co-worker. He really embarrassed himself and me in front of a lot of people. The next day, I gave a different male co-worker a ride home, which was something that happened every Wednesday. The guy I went out with followed us, confronted our co-worker and his wife about the affair I was having with him (I wasn’t). He then cried and pulled an actual white picket fence out of the neighbor’s yard and threw it at the dude. The police were called, it was a whole thing. The best part of the story is that the good co-worker was given a promotion so that he was the direct supervisor of both myself and the idiot. I didn’t have to work with that guy too much longer.
#33 Around the House
I had a gas station attendant look at my ID for what seemed like ages. I didn't think anything of it until I started seeing him around my house. The station was a block away, so I just figured maybe he lived in the area. Anytime I saw him, he referred to me by name, which was weird. Then one day, I went in to grab something and he told me he called my work looking for me. He also told me where I worked. I have no idea how he got this information and it freaked me right out. I never went back.
#34 Bunny Suit
I remember one time, a friend of mine in college broke up with her boyfriend. He, for some reason I’ve never been able to understand, rented a full-body bunny suit as part of a surprise to win her back. She still didn’t take him back, so he was left crying alone in a bunny costume on his bed. Kind of sad and funny.
#35 Subway Stop
One time on the subway, a guy asked me out. It was pretty busy and I was squished up against people. After I rejected him, he kind of just stood there awkwardly and kept asking until his subway stop. It was a pretty bad experience because I couldn’t really move anywhere and he continued after me rejecting him.
#36 Not Interested
I told this guy I wasn't interested many, many times. I finally had to tell him slowly and loudly, and in front of many witnesses that I wasn't interested. I also said I would never be and would get school admin involved if he didn't leave me alone. Then the real harassment started. He started following me around school and onto my school bus. There were threats, he would scream delightful gender-based slurs at me, which meant to humiliate me in front of the rest of the school. He would also drive by my house real slow and he stalked me well into my 20s.
#37 Breaking Up
I broke up with my boyfriend and he stole my dog, turned up at my place of work, and told me my house was going to burn down. Later that night, he also torched my car while it was parked in my driveway. I did get my dog back, though. The cops brought her home to me and I sent her on a holiday to my dad’s so she was safe. People do the craziest things.
#38 30-Year-Old Grudge
In 1989, I broke up with a guy I had dated while in high school. These days, we still have mutual friends in common. When he goes over to their homes, if a picture of me is visible, he’ll flip it around and loudly announce that “everything is nicer now.” He's literally almost 50 and even his wife knows he's not over it.
#39 Birthday Wish
I was celebrating my friend's birthday and this one guy insisted on walking me back home before popping the question. I politely told him I wasn't interested. He proceeded to plead and beg, saying that it was his birthday, that was his birthday wish, and I shouldn't ruin his birthday. I politely declined, over and over again. This continued back and forth until I saw one of my friends walking by. I instantly called him over. Without thinking, I introduced the two of them and promptly went, "I have to go now, bye!" I then went inside and locked the door.
#40 Getting Lawyers Involved
I didn't overtly reject this guy, he just realized I didn't "like" him back. (We were ten when this started.) So he harassed me until my parents told the school they were going to sue his parents and subpoena my entire grade (forcing the principal to deal with 60 sets of angry, entitled parents) unless the administration separated us.
#41 Third Grade Stalker
I didn't like this one kid in grade three, so he wrote me notes and would circle his tears and label them on the paper. He threatened to hurt my best friends. He called me over and over while I was on the phone with my dad. (We had a book with everyone's phone numbers from the school. I have no idea why that was a thing.) It got to the point the teachers were going to keep me inside during recess because of him. My mom put a stop to that. They had to keep us separated the rest of the year. I have no idea what happened to him after that.
#42 Elaborate Story
When I broke up with my ex, he injured himself because I wouldn’t take him back. He then called me and came up with an elaborate story about how he was “dragged out of his car and attacked.” On a main road. With plenty of light… and a whole bunch of traffic and surveillance cameras from stores. He ended up driving himself to the hospital and had to get emergency surgery. I was called the next day by a detective who told me it was self-inflicted. I immediately cut off all contact with him and any of our shared friends. But, I still felt guilty for months thinking that I caused someone to seriously injure themselves.
#43 New Dad
This one time, I remember that my sister got followed home by a dude she rejected. Well, apparently he didn’t take it very well. He went up to the house and started talking to her kids, telling them that he was their new dad. Luckily, the real dad came out… in his full police attire. So, he put an end to that real quick.
#44 Seat Mate
I was on a bus once and this guy sat in the seat next to me. He started talking to me, but I gave one-word answers and didn’t look at him. I just scrolled through my phone and tried to ignore him. Then he started saying creepy things like that I was “too friendly” and he was surprised I hadn’t had trouble on the bus before.
I couldn’t move because he was on the seat next to the aisle. I was getting ready to text my boyfriend to meet me somewhere in case this guy actually followed me off the bus. But, he got off the bus before me, thank God. I was pretty shaken up, to be honest. I was afraid to be alone with a guy for a week after that.
#45 Turning Her Friends
When I broke up with my first boyfriend, he refused to get off the phone with me. He argued with me for two hours that I must be dating someone else if I wanted to break up with him. I was dumb, young and didn't just hang up like I should have. He told every single one of our friends that I was going behind his back. Overnight, no one would talk to me. I felt really bad and helpless about the whole situation for years, like I was the bad guy.
#46 Gut-Wrenching Tears
When I broke up with my boyfriend of two years, he burst into snotty, gut-wrenching tears and started dry-heaving. Then, the night after I moved all my stuff out of the apartment, he kept calling me and hanging up as soon as I answered. He finally didn't hang up when I answered at 3:00 a.m. He said some nasty things. For weeks, he also left me things in my mailbox, little presents like candy, CDs, and a game.
#47 Rescheduling a Date
I had set up a date with a guy I met on a dating site. We messaged and texted for about a week or so. After I set up the meeting with him, I learned one of my best friends was coming into town for the weekend and wanted to get together. My friend was only going to be in town for that night. I texted my date and asked very nicely if we could reschedule to the next night, explaining why.
I wasn't rejecting him, I just needed to reschedule. But, he lost his mind. He called me all kinds of names, cursing along with it and told me never to contact him again. I just told him, “okay.” I figured I dodged a bullet. Also, I realize he'd probably been stood up a time or two and was jaded, but I would like to be judged by my own actions, not those of others.
#48 Blocked Number
The worst time for me was a guy stalking me for about two months. He kept calling me from a blocked number and did nothing but breathe on the phone the whole time. He’d also continue to drive by my house and usual spots, which he somehow found out I frequented. I couldn’t sleep normally for a few months because of him.
#49 More Money
The time that comes to mind is probably the guy who got mad that I wouldn't go to bed with him for $750. So, he upped it to $1500. At that point, I decided to block him on Facebook. He then created a fake profile and offered me $3000. When I said no, he said he hoped someone would come after me. And he lives in my apartment complex.
#50 Vacationing in India
When I was 17 and on vacation in India with my parents, I turned down the advances of a guy who worked at a shop we were visiting. He then casually asked my dad what hotel we were staying at. My dad, not knowing that this guy had been following me around, told him the name of our hotel. With just that information, he showed up late that night, calling my room repeatedly and whispering about how he was waiting in the lobby.
Once I stopped answering all of his phone calls, he started to send notes up to me. They were slipped under the door. I didn't know my parents' room number and I was too afraid to go out in the hallway by myself. So, I spent the entire night terrified that this random creep would show up at my door in person.
