Women Share Girl Secrets Men Don’t Know About
Women can be mysterious creatures, especially to men. Between their makeup routines and their nonverbal forms of communication, it’s reasonable to be confused at times. However, a woman’s mystique is certainly not a bad thing. Anyone can appreciate at the lengths a woman will go to look or act a certain way because, even when it is extremely difficult, they often make it look incredibly easy.
But there’s a lot about women that men are not aware of, and maybe that’s because women want to keep it that way. More often than not, however, men just simply haven’t learned or picked up on certain things yet. That may change, thanks to the following women who recently shared girl secrets men don’t know about.
#1 Attire Approval
Women are fastidious about their attire. They adhere to seemingly frivolous fashion trends because they operating with the assumption that other women will be scrutinizing their every action. Every woman feels inhibited by her clothing choices because most other women are condemnatory. No woman is dressing for the benefit of men alone. She’s trying to elicit approval from other women. When a woman compliments you, you know you look absolutely spectacular.
#2 It’s A Science
Crying really can make us feel better. Sometimes, we even try to make ourselves do it on purpose in order to feel some relief. When we’re frustrated and upset about something that we can’t seem to fully process, we might seek out sad movies or songs so we can get it over whatever funk we’re dealing with. It’s a science.
#3 Comfort In Silence
Just being in your company, hanging out, reading, or playing video games in a comfortable silence is one of the best ways to spend time with you. So don’t worry about talking all the time or scrambling for new conversation topics—we simply appreciate spending time with you and being in you presence. It’s that simple.
#4 Lady Locker Talk
I don’t think guys realize how inappropriate women can be. My friends and I talk about going #2 just as much as men. We’re crude too. We talk like sailors too. We even have our own “locker room” talk.
I can only speak for myself, but when a guy asks me what I am thinking and I say nothing, usually, like the guys have said, I am thinking about saving the world from a T-Rex, being a member of Avengers, or living with the VonTrapp family. I just don’t want to admit where my imagination has wandered off to.
#5 Up Your Sleeve
Men with somewhat veiny forearms and pushed up sleeves are a godsend. I like the sleeves because they like kind of leave things to the imagination. Muscular arms are another one—they look great, no doubt; but the hard work and dedication that person took in developing them are even more impressive. The effort is another thing that I appreciate from men, which may or may not be a part of why I like muscles in the first place.
#6 The Bag Trick
If you see me walking into the bathroom with a makeup bag, I’m not doing my makeup. Usually, I’ll already have a full face of makeup on, so there wouldn’t be anything to add, really. The truth is, I have my period and I hide my tampons in the bag. It’s a trick that a lot of women use because really… Who wants to walk around with a tampon in plain view?
#7 Hug It Out
Sometimes a hug will do a million times more good than trying to get me to explain why I’m upset, largely because I’m probably overwhelmed with my feelings and need time to process them before I can explain them. The fastest way to process and get them out? A hug. Give me a hug first, then maybe I’ll be ready to talk.
#8 Monthly Matters
Periods suck overall, but they are very different depending on the girl! Some women get emotional, while others are completely normal. Some periods last for eight days, some last for three days. Some girls are in extreme pain, and some just have mild discomfort. “I’m on my period” can mean anything from “Sorry, I’m completely incapacitated,” to “I’m just feeling a little worse than usual.”
#9 The Itchy Truth
Every so often, something itches. Is it a yeast infection? Is it a bacterial infection? Could it be dryness or irritation? Did something get stuck in my underwear? The answer is that 99% of the time everything is fine, but you’re still going to worry and squirm uncomfortably trying to get it to stop. Being a girl is tough.
#10 Brace Yourself
We all have a favorite bra that we probably haven’t washed in like, two weeks. This is the case despite the fact that most of us women own multiple bras. Among the selection, there is always going to be one bra that we favor of the others, just like men probably have a pair of boxers that they consider their favorite to wear.
#11 Pining For Pockets
A lot of guys don’t notice this, but our pockets are basically nonexistent. It sounds like a minor problem, but it really is a pain in the butt to carry around your keys, your phone, etc. without proper pockets. That’s why so many of us get big purses so that we don’t have to struggle all day, but then it sucks to lug around a bag all day. I guess what I’m trying to say is, enjoy your huge, always there, pockets.
#12 Mr. Fix It All
Sometimes if I’m struggling with a mechanical problem, I want to struggle with it until I fix it. If you see that I’m having trouble and take the broken thing away from me to fix it on the spot, I lose the chance to fix my own problem. I think if we approach you for help, that’s when it would be appropriate for you to step in.
#13 A Few Notes
A man’s hands are so sexy. Hugs are sexy too. sometimes we just need a hug, but there is nothing more attractive than being pressed up against a hot guy enough to smell his cologne. Play with babies and animals, even if you just tolerate them. An attractive man holding a baby is ovary-explosion worthy. Biologically, women are more attracted to men who seem like they’d be good father figures.
Don’t grab girls by the chin. It’s weird. Run your fingers gently under her jaw, and if she pulls away, BACK OFF. I’ve seen too many guys just not get the hint when the girl they’re into is bending over backward to avoid their lips. Nasty. Unless you know the girl, and she’s comfortable with it, don’t put your arms around her, or anyone.
#14 It’s Not You, It’s Us
Sometimes, when we don’t want to get it on with you, it has nothing to do with you. Most of the time, it’s because we aren’t feeling attractive. We are feeling gross from menstruation or menopause. We have something troubling us. Maybe a yeast infection. Maybe we haven’t shaved. And sometimes, we really do have a headache.
#15 Pregnancy Always Possible
I don’t know if it has been said, but I always think I’m pregnant. Craving a certain food? Must be pregnant. Feeling nauseous? Must be pregnant. My period didn’t show up the minute I thought it would? I’m clearly having a child. Having said that, my husband and I are currently trying so I’m in a constant state of anticipation.
#16 Exit Strategy
If you’re talking to a girl at a bar or a club and her friend comes up to you both with some reason to leave, the girl most likely asked her friend to do that. It’s usually the safest way to get out of a creepy conversation or uncomfortable situation. Her friend isn’t blocking you, you’re most likely blocking yourself.
#17 Sweating In A Sundress
I would say this only applies to women who are slightly bigger, but this was an issue for me even when I was very slim. Thigh rubbage is horrible when you wear a dress or skirt, particular in summer! We’re told to embrace our imperfections, but there’s also nothing wrong with identifying problem areas and wanting to improve them!
#18 A Hairy Mess
When girls are particular about their hair products, it’s not that they’re being overly superficial or picky. When your hair is long, the right shampoo, conditioner and drying routine can be the difference between soft waves and a dry, ratty mess. It’s just like how guys can be picky about what type of hair product to put in their hair.
#19 Look And Listen
Don’t be afraid of our emotions. If we’re freaking out about something, just actively listen. We don’t need you to offer any solutions; just listen with eye contact and respond with simple nods or shakes of the head. Then, finish off the interaction with a hug. Most of the time, she’ll be as good as new after that. She needs to know her emotions won’t scare you off.
#20 Deciding On Dinner
If you ask us where we want to go for dinner and we can’t decide, there are possibly two reasons: 1) The last time we suggested a restaurant, you complained, so we aren’t going to pick again because we don’t want to deal with that again. 2) We aren’t craving anything, so anywhere is fine; go to Yelp and pick the closest place to you that you haven’t tried yet. Make it an adventure.
#21 Restroom Rumble
Public restroom standoffs are a thing. Each woman silently sits and waits for the other to make the first move or noise in order to let others know they are going #2. Some women might even wait on the toilet for everyone else in the bathroom to leave before doing their business. Women are just naturally shy when it comes to that stuff, I guess.
#22 Miss Me With The Mall
Not all of us enjoy shopping. A lot of my female friends find shopping a chore. Unless required, we would rather sit at home on the couch and shop online, instead of going to an actual store. If I take a long time to shop, it’s because I can’t find something specific and none of the staff knows where it is. It’s very frustrating. I can’t speak for others, but it’s definitely the case for myself.
#23 The Fake Out
If a girl lies to you about having a boyfriend or gives you a fake phone number, it’s probably because she didn’t want to deal with the potential awkwardness or confrontation that would come from her saying she’s not interested. Of course, it sucks to be lied to, but many girls have found themselves in situations where men won’t take them seriously. Don’t take it personally!
#24 The Messy Miracle Of Motherhood
Pregnancy is way harder than you think it is. Even on a good day, I had pain in obscure parts of my body that overwhelmed me. The exhaustion is unparalleled. The hormones, muscle spasms, bone aches, crushing fears, uncontrollable circumstances… It is a lot to handle, and you literally cannot get a break from those things until the kid comes out.
Then, you have a whole new set of things to deal with. I say this as someone who actively wanted to get pregnant and will likely do it again someday. I love my daughter, and I loved a lot of things about being pregnant with her. But it was also kind of the worst. Birthing her was another nightmare in itself. So basically… React to pregnant and postpartum women with twice the kindness and empathy you think they deserve.
#25 Not Always Needy
Some of us like our alone time. Don’t freak out if we don’t text you back after a while. I’m the kind of girl that drops off the map for weeks at a time, but I always return. Always. I just like the outdoors and my quiet time.
#26 It’s Not A Challenge
If a girl tells you she’s a lesbian, believe her. Don’t try to convince her you can change her mind, catch her in a lie, or question why she looks so girly if she’s a lesbian. Nothing ruins my night faster than when I tell a guy this upfront so he knows I’m just trying to make a friend, and he turns it into a challenge. At the same time, there are some girls who say they’re gay just to brush off a guy they’re not interested in. I actually hate when girls do that. It’s not fun to be a token excuse. In either case, you are wasting your time with a girl who doesn’t want to hook up with you.
#27 Not That Complicated
Guys think that girls are really complex, but that’s not always the case. I mean sure, sometimes I have a lot going on in my head. But other times, when we’re in the car and you think I’m angry about something, I’m really just thinking, “I wish I’d ordered the tacos at dinner instead of the chicken,” or “Did I remember to switch the laundry over? Darn.”
#28 Bride-To-Be Fantasy
If I have been in a relationship with you for longer than three months, I have, and will, at some point, imagine you proposing, dancing with me at our wedding, holding our first baby, and playing soccer with the same kid. I also know what song will be playing during our first dance at the wedding and it’s non-negotiable.
#29 A Girl’s Guy
We actually, genuinely like when guys are okay with embracing some femininity or just appreciate girly things instead of mocking it. Seriously. You don’t have to like stereotypically feminine things, but it really makes us like you a lot more if you’re open to learning about things we like or being a little “girly” every once in a while. It shows you’re secure in yourself and not immature. Plus, it kind of sucks to have things you enjoy mocked so much because it’s seen as stereotypical.
#30 Lashing Out
Many compliments we make (on lashes, brows, skin, and other things) are given because we are low key envious. In my personal experience, men are the ones who own the best lashes, for example. It sucks to want long, luxurious lashes and only being able to achieve them with falsies or extensions while some men, who don’t even care about their lashes, have the best ones.
#31 Desiring The Dad Bod
A good portion of us enjoys the “dad bod.” We also base our attraction to a man on how he interacts with animals, babies, children, and other adults. I swear to God, a soft, snuggly belly and someone who attentively listens to a six-year-old tell an entire story is so much hotter than the buff guy that rolls up his sleeves every time he walks by.
#32 Whatever Suits You
Seeing a man in a well-fitted suit and tie is probably equivalent to men seeing women naked. My husband recently tried on some suits and every time he came out of the dressing room, my heart skipped a beat. There’s just something about a man in a suit that drives me wild, and I’m sure other women out there can relate.
#33 All Made Up
A lot of times when we wear makeup, it’s not because we feel insecure or we think we’re ugly without it. We’re also not trying to catfish anyone. Some of us just like putting on makeup because it complements our entire outfit, similar to what a tie does to a suit. It’s also a lot of fun to learn the process of applying it.
#34 Work Dress Code
I wear dresses to work because women’s professional separates are so expensive. It’s easier and cheaper to buy an $80 dress than a $60 pair of pants and a $40 blouse. Plus, the quality will be a lot better. It sucks because if I had to choose, I would 100% go with a suit, but my bank account tells me otherwise.
#35 Hectic Hormones
Sometimes, I don’t know if I’m having a real mental breakdown or if it’s just the PMS hormones making my brain weird. I mean, sometimes I do get so frustrated I break down and cry in a completely period-free fit. But like, hormones can make me do crazy things… One time, I was at 5 Below and I saw these two stuffed animals. I spent like, 30 minutes trying to decide which one was cuter, then decided at some point that I was probably just PMSing. I was right.
#36 Universal Girl Code Behavior
It’s almost unofficial girl code that if anything is amiss dressing-wise (i.e., tag out, lipstick on teeth, underwear showing, necklace clasp rotated in front, etc.), we take a girl aside and help them out. Also, if it isn’t obvious enough if you walk up to any girl who looks like she feels uncomfortable for any reason, you’re instantly her friend. No questions asked.
#37 Abreast The Situation
I’m not sure, but I think a lot of girls are insecure about their breasts. I mean, actresses usually have perfect breasts, and even if they don’t, you can usually find some nasty comments about that. Some girls with smaller breasts would like to have bigger ones. Some girls with bigger breasts would actually like to have smaller ones.
Breasts might be asymmetrical, might be saggy, or might have a weird shape. And the worst thing is, without surgical intervention, sometimes there’s not much we can do about it. I mean, it’s similar with your face—you can make peace with your insecurities eventually and if someone doesn’t like it, then they just don’t.
#38 All Torn Up
Sometimes when we wear ripped jeans, we just shave the parts of our legs that show through.
#39 Play It Safe
If a girl asks you if her outfit makes her look fat, do not say anything other than, “No, you look beautiful.” If you tell us we look fat in our outfits, you’ll be cussed out and we’ll probably cry hysterically. It’s no secret that girls are sensitive when it comes to things like that. Girls might care more about their image than most guys.
#40 Clear State Of Mind
I don’t know how true this is for most women, but I’ve talked about it with my female friends and it’s pretty true for them: Moreso than men, women need to be clear-headed, present, and decently relaxed before they can tap into their drive, or have that thought of like, “Hey, some intimacy would be awesome right now.”
Men, on the other hand, not only seem to have this experience multiple times a day regardless of what’s going on, but they’re more likely to desire to get it on when they’re stressed or have a lot on their minds. This has been true in most every conversation I’ve had with men and in every relationship I’ve had.
#41 Mother, May I
If we hate your mom, it’s probably because she’s made us feel less than great about ourselves. We will definitely feel the need to dress for every occasion and be a little on the defensive every time we are around her. If we love her, it’s because she’s made us feel loved and welcome, and we feel more relaxed around her like we would our own mother.
#42 Planning For The Worst
Most girls have a plan for what to do or where to go if we get assaulted. They also have a bit of a self-defense plan at the ready as well. Everyone has something.
#43 The Waiting Game
The true reason we go to the toilet together is… that the waiting queue would usually be so long that if we went alone, we will either get really bored or feel a little excluded from the conversation for the few minutes we are away from the group. We go together and chat the whole time that we are waiting in order to keep the good times rolling. A few other little things happen in there as well, but it’s really not that serious!
#44 Safe Date Designation
We have extensive texting and calling codes set up for going out on a date safely. “I’m calling you after 20 minutes. If you call me at any time, I’ll call right back and stage an emergency. If I call you and you decline, you’re okay and don’t want to be disturbed. If you let it ring unanswered, I’m coming your way right now to accidentally meet you.”
#45 Always Aware Of The Stare
We are always aware of the male gaze, no matter how nonchalant you’re attempting to be.