Women Describe The Creepy Things Guys Often Do, But Are Fully Unaware Of
Guys seem to have a knack for knowingly or unknowingly being creepy, and nearly every girl has been in a situation where she’s wondered what the guy is thinking. For the guys that don’t mean to do it, pay close attention to these stories! These women have shared their personal accounts of some of the creepiest things guys have done or said to them. If you’re a guy that’s ever wondered what you should avoid saying or doing, this is for you!
The fine people over at Reddit shared these stories with us, and while they might seem almost funny, trust me, for the women affected by this kind of thing, it’s definitely not funny. All the ladies out there will be able to relate to these stories, and we hope all the fellas learn a thing or two about how they should behave.
#1 He Won’t Take No For An Answer
Not taking no for an answer, even in completely basic situations.
“That looks heavy, let me carry that for you!”
“No thanks, I’ve got it.”
“Come on, I’ll help, I’ll just walk you to your door.”
“No, really, that’s okay.”
No means no, and I’m so sick of it being ignored.
#2 She Doesn’t Want A Sugar Daddy
Offering to buy stuff for me in a store, or just offering me stuff in general. I get it if I’m a few bucks too short or you’re just offering innocent help but offering me stuff when I did nothing to engage you is not the way to go. This usually happens with older men too. I could probably make a list of all the things men have creepily tried to give me. I’m only 15.
#3 Time To Go, She’s Not Interested
I’m a male but I run a bar with a lot of female bartenders. One of the creepiest things that I see consistently that drives me insane is the guys who will try and stay after we’ve closed to “flirt” with the bartender as she’s closing. They end up trying to follow the bartender around while she’s just trying to ignore them and get her job done. No bartender likes this. Stop doing it!
#4 I Have A Boyfriend
Guy: Do you have a boyfriend?
Guy: Do you actually love him? Are you sure he’s not cheating on you? Well, do you want a friend?
Me: Unless you want me to bring my boyfriend along, there is no way I’m just going to be friends with you, especially when you approach me trying to hit on me. And yes, I do actually love him.
#5 Being Friendly Doesn’t Mean I’m Into You
Being friendly to a guy and they automatically believe you want to go out with them. So they ramp up the flirtiness and physical contact.
#6 Work Is For Work, Not Flirting!
I really don’t like it when guys hit on me at work.
To be more specific: I’m in customer service and I have to be nice to everyone. I can’t really leave the situation as I’M AT WORK. Nothing makes me feel more trapped than a dude that spends an hour asking me about some product in a thinly veiled attempt at flirting with me.
#7 Please Don’t Play The Guessing Game
“I can totally guess women’s bra sizes. You’re a 34C right?”
Dude, please stop. No, you can’t. Please leave me alone.
#8 It’s Called Personal Space…
Edging closer to you during a conversation until they’re practically right in your face… its not going to get you anywhere with me and no, you’re not smooth.
#9 Don’t Act Like You Know Me
Once at a family party, this elderly man insisted on dancing with me almost the whole night. I didn’t mind this so much because I was only there with my mum and didn’t know that many people. He then continued to try to read my body language and tell me how he knows that “there are things that I’m trying to hide” and how I have a “secret temperament”. Please don’t try to pretend to “read” a girls behavior, especially if she’s about a third of your age. This is just creepy.
#10 It Means You’re Desperate, Not Confident
I know it’s not that common, but there was one guy I knew who had a habit of putting his arm around girls’ shoulders that barely knew him and without their consent.
He thought it made him look confident and cool, but we thought he was a desperate creep.
#11 I’ll Smile Whenever The Heck I Want To!
“You should smile more.”
“You’re so pretty when you smile.”
Got a random Facebook message from a guy that went to my old college (I don’t know who he is though) saying something along those lines.
#12 Don’t Ever Say This To Her
As a black female, it is absolutely infuriating when guys hit on you by stating that they’ve never dated a black girl before and start with all that chocolate caramel stuff. That doesn’t make me feel special. Just be normal, please!
#13 Why Don’t You Just Take A Picture
Staring; like straight up gawking.
You know women have peripheral vision too, right? Just because I’m not looking right at you doesn’t mean you’re being slick.
#14 He Should Take The Hint
Violating personal space. If you take a step toward me and I step back, that is not an invitation to slowly chase me around the room. That is an indication that you are close enough.
#15 Don’t Do This Unless I Ask For It
It’s really off-putting when guys come on too strongly. Like I get it you want something, but I want to be able to carry a decent conversation with the person I’m interested in that doesn’t involve unsolicited pictures or flirting. I think a general rule with that stuff is if we don’t ask for it, don’t do it. A lot of guys open with it, and it’s pretty gross when it’s not asked for.
#16 Get Out Of Her Way
Blocking you by extending their arm and putting their hand on the wall. Quick tip, buddy: if you have to physically block my escape, it’s already over.
#17 That’s Going To Leave A Mark
This happened to me in a nightclub many years ago. There was a railing between the dance floor and the table area and I was taking a break from dancing with my friends and we were walking around the club to see if anyone we knew was there. It was a small city.
Anyway, this monster of a guy puts a hand on the rail in front of me and the other on the back. I was teeny tiny and it made me really nervous. He says, “Now you’re going to talk to me”, or something like that. I told him to let me go. He laughs, so I tell him again. He shakes his head, so I tell him if he doesn’t move I’ll hit him. Now, that really made him laugh because he was like three times my size.
Let’s just say I wasn’t bluffing, and he learned his lesson the hard way. I have no regrets; that guy had it coming!
#18 She’s Just Not Into You
I was out with my friend and we were dancing together, fully engaged with just each other and chatting as we danced. A guy tried pushing into our dance.
First, he pushed into the gap between us and tried dancing with just me. I stopped dancing and stepped away. My friend reached out and pulled me back to her and began dancing with me again, pulling me in closer to close the circle to make it clear we weren’t looking for company. He did it again. My friend straight up pulled me away and we walked out of the room.
Later that night, the guy saw us and came over and started screaming and shouting that we were rude for ignoring him…
#19 Do It Without Saying It
Making a point of talking about how respectful/safe/feminist you are. Do it once, and OK, maybe you’re just shy or nervous. Do it twice or more, and it gets progressively creepier. Believe me, if you’re really a quality guy, I’ll be able to tell without being told.
#20 Mom Taught Me NOT To Talk To Strangers
When someone is sitting next to you and you are minding your own business and they say something like “You don’t talk much, do you.” It’s because I don’t want to talk to strangers.
#21 Not Cute, Just Creepy
Where I work, the ice cream machines are really large, and I have to bend over them to clean the very back. This is often met with, “You’re distracting me,” or, “Now I’m too distracted to work,” from certain guys in the kitchen.
That ain’t cute.
#22 Stalking Is Never Cool
Not sure if this is common but I take the same train to and from work every day. After a night out, I was heading home and a man stopped me saying “Oh, you’re working late? You don’t normally get on this train. I thought I missed you. Still going to (the place I live)?” It could have been harmless but it was past 10pm and it felt creepy as anything, so I switched carriages. It felt weird, almost like he was analyzing my journey like a stalker.
#23 He Won’t If He Knows What’s Good For Him
Force me to kiss you on the cheek?
Some dudes in the “total stranger” category already pulled that one on me, and wouldn’t stop pestering me as long as I hadn’t done it. One time, a guy wouldn’t let me go until I kissed him on the cheek.
It’s not just for men, but for people in general: it’s better to avoid touching people you don’t know, and “no” is a perfectly valid answer to any request.
#24 Don’t Act Like Her Friend
Insist that they “just want to be friends” after hitting on you and getting rejected. If your idea of being “friends” only means going out for a meal alone, and talking to me only when no one else is around, no, you don’t want to be friends. I’m not stupid.
I had that exact situation play out with a coworker recently. Dude would not leave me alone for months.
#25 Being Nice Isn’t Leading On
Getting mad at women for, “why didn’t she just say no/why did she lead me on?” in the same breath as they harass women for “not giving guys a chance”. Generally, just pursuing women who aren’t interested or keep brushing you off.
You know that tip about reading back a phone number incorrectly to see if it’s real or they gave you a fake number? Yeah, if a woman gives you a fake number, accept it and walk away. If she did that, it’s because she does not feel safe just saying no, and she has reason to expect if she bluntly said “no, I’m not interested” to you directly, you would get aggressive with her.
Women try to be as polite and gentle in their rejections as possible because of their genuine fear of violent retaliation if they don’t, but then they get accused of “leading men on”.
Or, they are being genuine friends to guys they genuinely like, but those guys cannot process a male and female friendship, so they assume it’s about romance.
#26 Did He Really Just Do That
I once had a guy I just met in a park while walking my dog act like he found something cool. He then asked me to hold out my hand and try to interlace his fingers with mine.
Like dude, are you seriously trying to hold my hand? I DON’T KNOW YOU. Then he proceeded to try to convince me something was wrong with me for not wanting to hold hands with a stranger.
#27 Don’t Compare Us
I have met zero women, myself included, who like being compared favorably or unfavorably to other girls you’ve dated. The former makes it seem like you want us to be her, and the latter makes you seem like you can’t get over her.
#28 Not On The Bus
Stop hitting on women on public transit, I promise if the headphones are on or the phone is up we don’t want to talk.
Bonus points to the one guy last month who stared me down most of the bus ride, made and effort to point out I had headphones on, made fun of my cane, and then yelled at me for being rude because I told him to cut the weird jokes. Got off a few stops too soon on that one despite being disabled.
Calling me a female instead my name. That’s just rude! Who does that?
#30 Just Ask Once, Then Stop
If you ask a woman out and get rejected, please don’t keep trying, start that strange negotiating, or try to poke holes in the woman’s “excuse”. You might think something may come of it or that it’s harmless, but the more a guy wheedles, the more questionable they seem.
#31 They Are People
Here’s some simplistic advice: remember, women are just people too. Done.
If your only experience is dependent on what you’ve read or seen online, talk to all kinds of people especially both men and women in person. Social interaction to people of different races and cultures to broaden your worldview while you’re at it. Simple simple stuff.
Not everyone is going to like you. It’s ok. You have no idea what is going on in their life, so don’t take it personal if their life won’t involve you in that moment.
#32 Don’t Touch That
#33 The Clues Are Obvious
Not reading obvious body language. If we have just met and you’re rattling on for 5 hours and I’ve said about 3 uninterested words, it means that I don’t want to talk to you or I feel uncomfortable. Same goes for if I am trying to walk away from a guy on the street who gives me the creeps, please don’t try to follow a girl when she’s obviously quickening her pace.
#34 Oblivious To Clues
Being intentionally oblivious to cues – “not noticing” when I’m clearly jerking away from your touch. Or if you’re not a friend but just a random stranger in public, trying to “keep the conversation going” by saying things like “Don’t be so tense!” or “I’ve had it with your one-word answers, lol”. Obviously these are signs that I’m not interested and am looking for a way out of the conversation, and obviously you can see them because you’re commenting on them, so you’re just willfully misunderstanding them here. In my experience this is a way to manipulate me into apologizing for being uncomfortable.
Excessive touching – even if it’s in non-sexual areas, like on the arm or back, too much of it creates forced familiarity, plus it’s hard to object because it’s “just friendly” and not technically a grope. Or letting your hand linger for too long and turning a simple pat creepy. Especially on an area of my back that happens to not be covered by my top. Ugh. Or constant leaning. Or unnecessary, unreciprocated, constant hugging that borders on a bit too intimate and makes no sense in context. The list goes on…
#36 Asking About Tattoos
When a random guy asks you to see your tattoo, then follows up asking to see your inappropriate ones too. Gross.
#37 Eyes Up, Mr.
In the middle of a conversation, doing a full body scan or chest stare. It’s obvious. We see you.
#38 “Drama Queen”
It’s pretty stupid, but in study groups in college, guys will have no problem interrupting girls to explain a concept better. Or even worse, they’ll take chalk/markers out of their hands to re-explain what’s already on the board. One of my friends got so annoyed, she threw the chalk on the floor when they tried to take it out of her hands. It was infuriating because the guys just called her a “drama queen” and went on with their studying.
Constantly messaging us after we’ve (clearly) made it clear we don’t want to talk to you. Those 20 Facebook messenger notifications a day just makes you look desperate.
#40 Like It
Liking every single social media thing I post within a minute of me posting it. If you’re going to stalk me at least be more subtle.
#41 Glasses Don’t Help
Assume that sunglasses hide the fact that you’re staring at me. I see you! Creep.
#42 Avoid Talking About Skin
Giving many, many compliments about how soft her skin looks …… on the first date.
#43 Cat Calls
Please don’t talk to girls from out of your car window… it just feels like a creeper-van situation, no matter what vehicle you drive.
#44 Friend Zone
Complaining that they always get friend zoned- as if girls don’t get friend zoned either. Or complaining how they never get girls and they’re such a “nice guy”, when really they are reaching for the wrong people.
#45 No Cushion
“I love big girls…more cushion if you know what I mean,” and then get mad at me for giving you a dirty look as I walk away. As an overweight woman I don’t want to hear this. Its not some magic phrase that will get you laid by a big girl. It’s not original nor has it ever been effective. The nerve to think I should be jumping in your lap and feel grateful that you would sleep with me is beyond me.
#46 I Can Walk Alone
Insisting on walking me to my car. Look dude, if I repeatedly tell you that I’m fine by myself, you’re the one I’m afraid of.