Hurt People Share The Worst Excuse Someone Used To Reject Them
Rejection hurts. It doesn’t matter who you are or how much confidence you have, it hurts us all. However, there are levels of rejection—there are ways to let people down softly, and then there are ways of rejecting a person that hurt to the core, perhaps creating a traumatic memory that lasts for the rest of life.
The stories below recount situations where the rejection included a ridiculous excuse that felt like an obvious lie. Were they lies? Probably yes, but in some cases, it’s hard to say. What is clear is that many people are cowards when it comes to rejecting or breaking up with someone. They hide behind a lie because they’re not strong enough to tell the truth. Are there cases where the excuse is better than the truth? Perhaps you should be the judge of that yourself.
#1 Maybe He Secretly Wanted Two Sets Of Parents
A guy that I went on two dates with mentioned that he wanted only to be in a relationship with someone who was very close with their parents. Since we were both gay, I thought he would understand that I was disowned by my family for being gay because that is fairly common. We were in the middle of dinner and when I told him that my parents cut all ties with me. He immediately ended the date and told me to not contact him again. I found it shocking how abruptly and passionately he ended the date. To this day, I am still curious as to why he ended things like that.
#2 Now Here’s A Person Who Is Not Sensitive To Disabilities
I had a girl tell me, “I can’t date you because… What if we go on a date to somewhere with stairs?” I’m in a wheelchair.
#3 Quit Playin’ Games With My Heart
We went out to dinner one night, and out of nowhere, she said to me: “Thanks for giving me the confidence to know that I can put myself out there again.” As she explained it, she agreed to be with me just so she could figure out if she could even survive a relationship. I was her test run and nothing else. That hurt for a while.
#4 The Ultimate In Hypocrisy
#5 She Put Him On Hold In Real Life
#6 He Only Goes For Some Younger Women, Not All
He told me it was weird dating someone so much younger, especially since I was just one year older than his little brother. This was stupid logic because he was only two years older than me. We were in high school. It was also a lie because he later dated my best friend who was, admittedly, older than me. We had the same exact birthday.
#7 Hit The Road If You Don’t Have A French Accent
I don’t speak English with a French accent, so I wasn’t as exotic as he thought I would be. English isn’t my first language, but neither is French. My first language is Finnish, but I speak both English and French fluently, as I grew up in French-speaking countries. I picked up English later because I ended up at an international school at some point. You can see how this would add to my confusion.
#8 Blame It On God
#9 He’s Better Off Without Someone Like That Anyway
#10 No Butterflies Is A Dealbreaker
#11 Not Fat Enough To Be Her Man
#12 “Real Men” Are Huge Carnivores, It Seems
#13 Looking For A Stage-One Clinger
Apparently, I was not clingy enough for her liking. Admittedly I’m not really a clingy person, but neither was she. She eventually went for my best friend who is the most clingy person I know and she literally destroyed him emotionally. Seeing what had happened to him, I realized I dodged a bullet, although I got annoyed and basically forced him to end it as he was so unhappy and kept coming to me in tears. He hasn’t been the same since.
#14 Guys Often Can’t Handle When Girls Are Smarter Than Them
#15 A Real-Life Mean Girl Wannabe
When I was 14, my best friend wrote me a two-page break-up letter. In the letter, she explained that she needed to “improve her social standing” and that she couldn’t do that while being associated with me. She outlined her 14-step plan to become popular and apparently, step three was to cut ties with all of her unpopular or weird friends.
I only read a few lines before I gave it back and told her she was a moron. She just smiled sadly and wished me well in life, unfriended me from everything and refused to even look at me for two months. Well, eventually she realized her plan was nonsense and that her relationship with the ‘popular kids’ actually got worse because of it. She came crawling back, but I never forgave her.
I like to think I handled that whole situation with maturity and grace, but it really messed me up for a while and it’s still one of the most hurtful things a person has ever done to me.
#16 Get Your Nationalities Right
He said he would never date a Mexican. I’m Pakistani. At the very least, I’m glad he was honest with me. His true colors came out the day he told me that, and I’m just glad I didn’t end up dating a racist. Being from Pakistan is hard enough with all of the stereotypes pitted against us. I don’t need someone who would make me feel worse.
#17 She Didn’t Fit The Bill Of The Filmmaker’s Wife
He said I wasn’t part of his career goals. He was on the path to do stuff in the film industry. He had an apprenticeship lined up in California and was accepted into a film school for his masters. I’m just going into business management—I don’t come from a rich family with connections, and I don’t match the description of a film maker’s wife. So I packed my bags and left without a tear.
#18 How Would She Have Acted If She Knew The Real Reason?
#19 Inevitable Conflict Between A Hippie And A Jock
I had a girlfriend break up with me because I wasn’t a vegetarian and I played football. We were crazy for each other and things were going great, but one day, she said she was “torn” and didn’t know how to handle her feelings. She cares for me, but my playing football and eating meat was too much for her.
#20 He’s Not Really A Phone Person
I did a six-month study abroad program halfway across the globe and met a guy from my program whose home was only a state away from mine. We became close and eventually started dating, staying at each other’s place, and traveling together. On the way back to the states, we did a stop-over in another destination. It was a great time. His folks paid for a romantic meal and a bottle of bubbly for us to enjoy as they were excited to meet me later in the fall when they would come for a visit.
The first leg of the flight to the US was 13 hours. Everything was still going great, and there were no red flags yet. We got to my terminal for my flight to my state and he said, “So, I don’t really do phone calls or anything. I’ll just see you around on campus in September and maybe we can grab a coffee or something.” He then patted me on my shoulder, turned around and walked away. And that was that.
#21 Getting Even Is More Important Than Being Happy For Some
“You rejected me a few months ago, and even though I still like you, it’s my turn to reject you.”
#22 Not Religious Until Marriage
#23 Short Hair, He Cares
“I mean, with your short hair you look like a boy, I don’t want people to think I’m into guys.” I saw him leave the gas station the other day, eight years later. He’s overweight, and his facial hair is really patchy. I sort of felt really good after that. And, just for the record, I still rock my short hair. Don’t let any man influence you into doing something you don’t want to do.
#24 She Won’t Date A Man Who Talks To His Stomach
I had a girl, who I was dating for about five months, break up with me because on my birthday I was having some stomach issues and was very uncomfortable. I went to use the bathroom and I said aloud to my stomach something along the lines of, “Are you kidding me? Can’t you just be normal today? It’s my birthday and I want to spend it with my girlfriend!”
A few weeks later, we broke up and she said, “You were talking to your stomach like it was a person! That’s not normal!” She just couldn’t understand why I had conversations with my stomach. In retrospect, I think it was a very good thing we broke up. I don’t think I could ever be with someone who takes little things like that so seriously.
#25 Music Can Make A Big Difference
#26 Some Shoes Just Tie Differently
In first grade, my crush was asking around if someone could tie his shoes because I guess he didn’t know how to. I wanted a reason to talk to him, so I offered to tie his shoes. When I went up to him, he just said, “No thanks… These shoelaces are different, you won’t know how to tie them… ” He just wanted to shoo me away. I was one broken-hearted six-year-old.
#27 She’s Looking For A Real Giant
“Sorry… I only like tall boys.” IS SIX-FOOT-ONE NOT TALL ENOUGH FOR YOU?
#28 His Male Ego Got In The Way
#29 All That She Wants Is A Baby
I wouldn’t get her pregnant. She was just a girl I knew for several weeks. Then the second time doing it, she asked me to give her a baby. I worked in retail and couldn’t even afford to support myself, so I told her no way. On our next date, she left me waiting at work where she was supposed to pick me up. I went to look for her and found her in her car with another guy. I broke it off. A year and a half later, I was working another job and saw her shopping. There she was, holding a baby.
#30 She Confused Her Own Bad Behavior For His Jealousy
I was 18 and in a long-distance relationship. It took us a while for us to finally meet. I drove up to her for New Year’s and everything was awesome. We had a lot of fun. I also met an extended part of her family and I liked all of them. Eventually, I had to drive back home and tears were shed. We promised to meet again, as soon as possible. Spoiler, we didn’t meet again.
Not two weeks after I drove back home, she started talking about one of her male friends and how all her other friends thought they’d make a great pair. I reacted totally smooth at first, but I got fed up pretty fast. I asked her what she wanted to achieve with her stories and she freaked out on me.
She told me that she couldn’t deal with my jealousy. She broke up with me after telling me she was with the guy already. This time, I cut communications. Fast forward half a year and she started talking to me again, asking “for her friend” if it was normal that “the boyfriend of her friend” didn’t seem attracted to her. I played along and lo and behold, my ex had dumped me for a gay guy. I had a laugh and closed the book on that.
#31 Apparently, Graduate Students Don’t Work
I moved back to a city that I had previously spent a summer in. I was chatting with a girl in the lobby of the local independent movie theater and mentioned how excited I was to be back there. She asked me what brought me back, and I responded that I was a graduate student. Then I asked her what she did. Her response is etched in my brain: “Oh, I work for a living.” And with that, she turned around and walked away without another word. I was offended for about half a second before I started chuckling.
#32 He Prefers His Dead Best Friend’s Widow
He texted me, “My buddy died a year ago and his widow has finally decided that she likes me. I am in love with her.”
#33 His Ailments Were Real And She Didn’t Believe Him, Hospitalized And All
We had been dating for a year and I thought we had become close. But she left me when I was fighting for my life in the hospital for two weeks during an extreme autoimmune disease flare-up. Specialist teams were trying to determine if cancer or infectious diseases were contributing to my symptoms and were constantly telling me new possibilities after hundreds of tests. I kept her updated every day about what the doctors were telling me. She told me I was being manipulative and must have been lying for sympathy.
#34 “You Don’t Look Like Scarlet Johannsson”
I met a guy online. We saw a few pictures of each other before we met and had talked for three weeks. The guy was convinced that I was perfect for him in every way, and he was super excited to meet in person. So was I! We really clicked. The date felt a little awkward, but we had fun and talked a lot. So I was surprised when three days later, he told me he didn’t want to see me anymore. He said he was not as attracted to me as he thought he was, and he was upfront about why: I didn’t look like Scarlet Johannsson. YOU SAW MY PICTURE BEFORE YOU MET ME!!! YOU KNEW!!! YOU KNEW I DIDN’T LOOK LIKE HER!!! WHAT THE HECK MAN?!
#35 If He Can’t Play An Instrument, He’s Not For Her
#36 She’s Got “Mommy Issues” All Wrong
A girl told me she couldn’t date someone with serious mommy issues as I had. My mom had died two months earlier.
#37 He Can’t Handle His Love
“I like you too much. I look at you and think what an amazing mother you would be to our kids and I don’t want to be with someone I like that much.” This was 15-ish years ago, so even though it took a while to get over, it’s all good now. Turns out he was right, I am a good wife and mother, just not with him.
#8 She Chose The Money Over Love
When I was in my late teens, I dated this girl who I had it really bad for. I was so happy with her. For a while, it was mutual. I worked my butt off for her stepdad who liked me because I was a hard, reliable worker. Her mother, however, hated me. Her only reason for this was that I wasn’t “rich enough” for her daughter.
To put this into perspective, this woman had no job, milked the state and government for disability despite being someone whose movements were never restricted, and sponged off my then girlfriend’s stepdad’s business to do whatever she wanted. She was a financial leech. There was a point where my girlfriend and her mom got in a fight over the fact that we had been dating for as long as we had been.
It got so bad, my girlfriend left and stayed with me for a while until things cooled down, which they did. One day, I had the day off from work and was sleeping in. My girlfriend had to work, so she left that morning. While I was asleep, she and her mom had some talk I was not privy to. Afterward, my girlfriend let her mom come in despite having to leave for work herself.
I have no idea when that happened. While I slept, her mom came into my bedroom, sat on my computer chair next to my bed, and watched me sleep. I do not know how long she did this. At some point, I woke up and she is sitting there watching me. My heart leaped into my throat. I was in stunned silence. She looked at me and said these exact words, “I guess I will have to learn to love you.” She then got up and left without saying anything else.
I had no context for any of it at that moment. We dated for a short while longer, and my girlfriend moved back home after things cooled off. One day, she came over to my place, and without provocation, broke up with me. I was completely heartbroken. It took me pleading with her for three hours just to find out what was going on.
The previous night, her mom had told her that if she broke up with me, she (her mom) would pay for her to go to college. Full ride. This really meant her stepdad would be paying for it, however. So that’s what happened. She dumped me, so she could go to UNC. At the time, I was devastated. I never imagined anyone would be that heartless and cold to me.
It was hard to fathom that the two-plus years we dated could mean so “little” to her. Any time after this that we bumped into each other, she never had the guts to look me in the eyes. Never. She would just walk right past me while staring at the ground. She even started dating someone else right afterward. As an adult, I get it. College is expensive. I have two degrees myself. But there’s still a part of me that will never forgive her for that.
#39 He Wasn’t Controlling Enough
My now ex-wife said she cheated because I gave her too much space. She went on to say that if I had been more strict and hadn’t let her go out with her sisters and friends, she wouldn’t have met someone else.
#40 She Was Spooked To The Core For Some Unknown Reason
I got dumped by my girlfriend of nine months. I was doing a month-long medical course with the army, and right at the end, they took us to this creepy, old hospital for a tour. Someone asked if we could see the morgue, so they took us down for a tour. It was like something out of a horror-movie: long dark corridor, old equipment of indeterminate function, stainless-steel autopsy tables, etc.
But there were no bodies or anything. I got home from the course, told my girlfriend, and she FREAKED OUT about it. She went and stayed with her mom that night, and the next day she came back with her ENTIRE family to pick up her stuff. She would not come into the house, and whenever I came to the door to try and talk to her, she would shriek and hide her face. Three years later, I bumped into her at a supermarket and she lost her mind. She ran out the door as fast as her legs could carry her.
#41 Shallow As A Puddle
Prior to my pregnancy, I had worked as a model. I was 5’10″, 120 pounds, and a size 0 with a 21.5-inch waist. After having my son, I developed a thyroid condition and gained 110 pounds, eventually getting up to 230 pounds. The doctors were total jerks and kept telling my husband that I was “depressed.” Uh, no I wasn’t.
Anyway, my husband refused to hug me, kiss me, touch me, be intimate me, nothing. Finally, he admitted to me that he thought I was “as big as a house” and that he was no longer interested in me because I wasn’t hot anymore. Eh, I ended up winning, though. I finally found someone to properly diagnose me, got on medication, and worked my butt off.
I lost every bit of the weight and even got my body fat lower than it was prior to being pregnant. I was fit, healthy, strong and THEN the guy wanted me. I divorced him of course. In fact, I’m thrilled he revealed what a shallow, petty, immature excuse for a man he was so early in our relationship so I could get over him and get on with my life.
#42 All She Wanted Was To Be Chased
I dated this girl semi-casually for about three months. Things were going well until one day, completely out of the blue, she dumped me. I told her, “No problem, I understand, no hard feelings!” Well, a couple of weeks after the fact, she texted me out of the blue and told me I completely blew it. When I asked what she meant, she said, “I dumped you because I wanted you to chase after me.” She was over 30.
#43 He Was Marriage Material And That Was The Problem
Out of nowhere, one day, after a few months of dating, she said: “There are guys you marry and guys you date. You’re a guy I’d marry, but I’m not ready for that yet.”
#44 Not An Allergy Person
“I don’t date people that are allergic to nature,” he said to me, because of my seasonal allergies.
#45 She Couldn’t Handle His Beautiful Eyebrows