I worked at an Italian restaurant and received a complaint that we didn’t have a burger and fries option on the menu.
When I was a cashier for my dad’s business, a lady was trying to cut in front of a line of about 8 people. I asked if she was in line, and she said: “No, I’m just moving my items around.” I told her “Whenever you’re ready just move over there” and pointed at the end of the line. She finagled in her cart for another two minutes and then came up to me and said: “I’m ready.” I said, “I’m sorry miss, but these people are in line.” She then goes off about how she’s been waiting for 20 minutes and demands to see my manager.
I look over and just said, “Hey dad, this woman wants to speak to you.”
My dad just said “You’re right, but don’t worry about it. If you get to the back of the line you’ll be out of here within a couple minutes.” As she starts walking to the back of the line he quips “Just like they taught you in kindergarten.”
#28 I’m Pretty Sure This Defies The Laws Of Math
I worked at Burger King in high school. I will never forget this. I was on drive-thru one night, and this lady orders a “large vanilla shake, in a medium cup.” I ask if she meant a “medium shake, in a large cup,” seeing as how I cannot put more liquid in a container than it will hold. She gets INFURIATED and drives up to the window. Screaming at me for not listening to her. In a loud, slow tone, like she’s talking to a deaf person, “IIII. WWWAAANNNTTT. AAAAA. LLLLLAAAARRRRGGGGEEEE. VVVVAAAANNNNIIIIILLLLLAAAAAA. SSSSSHHHHHAAAAAKKKKEEEE. IIIINNNN. AAAAA. MMMMEEEDDDDIIIUUUMMM. CCCCUUUUPPPPPP.” I almost got fired that night.
#29 It’s All In The Mind, I Guess
Not really a customer complaint, but I take care of my grandma, who is 101, and she always sends her soup back saying it’s too cold. When it is brought back re-heated, she promptly puts 3 tablespoons of ice/water and stirs them in to cool it down… It’s adorable.
#30 That’s Not How Purchases Work
A woman bought a white shirt. She then spilled red soda onto the shirt. To fix the stain she used a tide-to-go pen. She rubbed so hard it tore a hole in the fabric. Her husband tried to return it after they stained and tore the garment claiming that it must have been a manufacturing problem. No. Sir. That’s not how it works.
#31 Sounds Like Foreshadowing To Me
I had a young girl hand me her engagement ring and asked if I see anything in her trillion (triangular cut) diamond. I saw nothing. She asked if I could see the devil. I looked at it again and saw nothing. She then told me you could see it better on a cell phone picture. She takes a picture and hands me the phone with the picture. I see nothing and apologize. She says okay and moves on. Four years later I see her again, divorced. Maybe the devil was in there.
#32 Time For A Bowl Of Rice
When I worked at AT&T Mobility, I got this quite a few times:
Customer: My phone stopped working as soon as I left your store yesterday. I didn’t have time to come back in until now.
Obviously I take off the back, pull the battery and find the water indicator is completely red.
Me: Well, your phone isn’t working because your phone has liquid damage.
Customer: No, you gave me the phone like that. I never got it wet.
#33 Bring A Sweater
I once had a customer complain to me that the aisle was too cold… on the refrigerated aisle of a supermarket.
#34 Ice On The Bottom, Please
When I worked at Sonic, a girl once ordered an ocean water, easy on the ice. When I gave her the drink, she opened it and yelled, “I said easy on the ice….why is the ice on top?” She then goes, “I want the ice on the bottom.”
I told her, “I’m sorry ma’am but ice floats.”
She was still mad and just drove off.
#35 Employees Are Always Wrong
We had a sale on organic cabbage for 85 cent a pound, and a week later a woman came in claiming we had our cabbage on sale for 25 cents a pound but she had been charged 85 cents a pound. I told her it had been on sale for 85 cents a pound but I would call the produce department to find out for sure, and sure enough, it had been on sale for 85 cents a pound, and now it was about $1.79 a pound.
She wouldn’t have it.
She threw the biggest fit ever! “Even if I’m wrong, you should give me a dollar back! The customer is always right!” And I’m just like, what? My assistant manager overhears her yelling (since the entire store could hear her yelling) and decides to appease her by giving her a dollar and a $10 gift card for her troubles. The assistant manager later tells me that no one should have a bad day over a dollar.
You know, unless you’re employed by the store.
#36 Horse What?
When I began working in a grocery store, a woman complained to my manager because I did not know where she could find horse meat. Who even eats horse meat?!
#37 10×20 = 20×10
Working at a hardware store, overhear my manager and an older lady’s conversation an aisle over.
Manager: “Can I help you ma’am?”
Lady: “I hope so, you’re all out of my size of air filter!”
Manager:” Which size was that ma’am?”
Manager: “Let me see here.”
Manager looks around the shelf. “Here you go.” Hands the Lady a 20″x10″ air filter.
Lady: “I said I need 10″x20″!”
Manager keeps quiet, takes back air filter, holds it out in front of him, rotates it 90 degrees, and hands it back to her with a grin.
Lady leaves in silence, with the 20″x10″.
#38 STILL Not Hot Enough?
I was a cook at a restaurant. I’m just working my station like every other night and this ticket comes up. Pasta, steak, well-done, club sandwich; nothing out of the ordinary. Then the server comes up, “Hey, the guy at table X wants his steak
extra well done.”
Alright, sure. Throw the steak on, check the temp and the squishiness. Everything seems in order. Order up!
Five minutes later, the steak comes back. “Hey, he says it’s not well done enough.” Take a look at the steak where he cut in to it. It’s brown all the way through. Shrug it off, five more minutes on the grill. Cut it open on another part of the steak, ensuring that it is brown all the way through and all flavour has escaped this ruined piece of meat. Order up!
Comes back right away, “He still says it’s not well done enough”. Alright motherfucker. In to the deep fryer it goes.
Ten minutes in the deep fryer. Pat it down with some paper towel. Order up!
Server comes back, “Hey, he said it was the best steak he ever had.”
#39 Sugar Free Payback
I worked at a local ice cream store in high school and we always had some pretentious customers. On summer afternoon a lady came up to me and showed me that her ice cream had melted and wanted another one free of charge.
I gave her another cone, but this time I made it sugar free. She had it coming.
#40 Not My Daughter!
I had a woman yell at me, questioning why I had kicked her daughter out of the hot tub. I had to explain to her that I caught her daughter being intimate with her boyfriend in the tub. She wouldn’t have any of it, “MY DAUGHTER IS A GOOD CHRISTIAN GIRL!”
At this point the whole building is watching her and my manager comes over and offers to let her watch the security footage of her daughter.
#41 She Can’t Swim
Lady: “Why won’t you let my child swim in the deep end”
Me: “Because she can’t swim”
#42 Super Zero
I work at a local Walmart and we were hosting a pre-screening of the Man of Steel and I got to wear a full-sized superman cape for the week beforehand to help advertise it.
I had a customer complain that unless I was wearing the entire costume I was being unprofessional and shouldn’t be allowed to wear the cape.
#43 Yeah, No
I had a guy order a cheeseburger for his kid, take a bite out of it in front of me, then start a fit that the burger was “bitten into.” He kept demanding free food for it, and I kept telling him no. Like, really?
#44 I Can’t See It
I work at a hotel. Guest checks into room:
“This room is supposed to have an ocean view. I can’t see the ocean.”
“Sir, that’s because it is night time. I assure you the ocean is there.
#45 I Did What?
I was fired from my job at a popular fast food chain because I rejected the use of a coupon that was 6 years old! My manager didn’t love how I dealt with the situation, but come on, it was 6 years old, why did you even try!