People Share The Biggest Instance Of ‘Chaotic Good’ They’ve Ever Witnessed
There are good deeds, and there are chaotic good deeds. What’s the actual difference?
Chaotic good deals with doing what’s right regardless of how you do it. A normal person might call for security after witnessing a mall robbery. Someone under the chaotic good alignment will chase the perp down and knock them out. Or they might be pranksters with hearts of gold.
Fictional characters such as Batman, Robin Hood, and Han Solo have become prime examples of chaotic good over the years. Think hero, but slightly unstable. People with a chaotic good alignment have noble intentions but are willing to cross a lot of lines to see their brand of justice done. They’re good guys, but the kind that winds up in trouble with the law.
We scoured the Internet and tapped into our community to discover some of the craziest chaotic good moments people have witnessed in person. If you’ve always suspected you might have a bit of chaotic good in you, these outrageous stories are for you!
#35 Light My Fire
When I was in high school, there was a kid who was always lighting things on fire in one corner of the yard during lunch times. One day he deliberately lit the crotch of his school pants, just for fun or attention I guess, but it was instantly clear that it was a bad idea. Another kid saw it and ran straight over to put it out… by stomping on lighter kid’s crotch.
#34 Wooly Bully
A bully at our school had pushed a small kid down the stairs, and the kid got pretty badly hurt. That kid’s older brother told his friends about it, and one of them was the local drug dealer at school. He was named “K,” and was known for being pretty chill all the time. K goes up to the bully and says, “come into the bathroom, I got some good stuff here.” The bully goes in, and a second later, K decks him so hard in the face that the bully had to go to the hospital to get his braces removed from the inside of his gums. I never saw it happen, but I knew exactly when it happened because a few police officers had shown up and everyone was talking about it.
#33 Meet Me In The Bathroom
There was a girl my friend thought was cute when we were at some place (I don’t remember where) hanging out.
He mentioned that she was cute but told me not to do anything about it.
What do I do? Pretend I’m going to the bathroom. I had to go anyway. After I start talking to her and tell her my friend thinks she’s cute, she laughed and told me to give him her number.
Boom. They’re still dating 2 years later.
#32 Bear Necessities
I was jumped in the locker room by two guys in high school and was called to the office and suspended for 10 days “for fighting.” We were leaving school and I was heading to the buses and I ran into my older brother and his friend and told him what happened. He said, “We’re not going to the buses, come with me.” So me, my brother, and his best friend went back to the offices and found the office with the two guys in them. My brother ran in and punched one guy, the other guy got up and tried to run out of the room and was stopped at the door by my brother’s best friend who we nicknamed “Bear” because he was built like one. The guy turned around to try the other door, but my brother got to him and started wailing on him. Deputy of the school came in and tried to stop my brother and was bowled over. After almost everyone in the offices had to come and stop the melee. My brother ended up with 5 days suspension for fighting, but it was on that day he became my favorite Chaotic Good champion.
#31 Roll Up The Windows
My sister was one of those teenagers who wanted to be super cool and could be a total jerk about it, so just having a mother embarrassed her. One day we missed the bus, so my mom had to bring us to school, messing up her morning. My sister was really rude and kept telling my mom to hurry and this and that. She keeps complaining about where to get dropped off because god forbid someone sees her mom drive her into the senior parking lot. The parking lot had a large ramped sidewalk that went right up to the hallway with the senior lockers. My mom drove her car right up to the door. Her hood was only inches from hitting it, with the full hallway looking. She just looked at my sister and said: “only cool kids get this level of service.” My sister looked like she might die of embarrassment.
#30 You’re On Candid Camera
The vice principal in middle school was a jerk to about 90% of the students and had major favoritism issues. Every time something went missing or got damaged in his office, he’d immediately blame a student he didn’t like, even if they hadn’t been near his office in months. He has a laundry list of borderline psycho actions like making a student stay in school even though he couldn’t get his hand to stop bleeding because he “mentioned it in a rude way.” All in all, the place was one big power trip for him and he enjoyed bullying anyone he could. A grown man, bullying middle-schoolers.
So one day this nerdy kid came to school wearing a secret bodycam. His dad was some kinda cop and he took one from him. He ended up recording a full day of this guy’s behavior and mailed it into the superintendent.
#29 Better Safe Than Sorry
Once, I volunteered with a bunch of friends on an STDs/STIs awareness campaign. After talking to people, offering blood tests, and distributing condoms, we’ve got a bag with about 50-100 condoms left and were heading to a fast food joint. On our way there, we not only approached more random strangers to distribute it but also occasionally left them on windshields.
#28 Corndog Carnage
I went to college with this guy. He was a total creep and was always on the prowl for drunk girls to take advantage of. One such night, he preyed on a girl whose father was a member of one of the big fraternities on campus, so he was very respected. The next day when this guy was walking back to his dorm from the dining hall, nibbling on a to-go corndog, he was ambushed by the current fraternity members. They surrounded him, yelling and threatening him, making sure he knew not to mess with girls again. One of the guys had been pretty quiet, just kind of standing there menacingly. Suddenly, he comes at the guy and growls “GIVE ME A BITE OF YOUR FREAKING CORNDOG!” Hands shaking, the guy extended his arm and the guy took a big chomp. Anyway, the guy did not return the next semester.
#27 Robbery Of A Lifetime
Not my personal experience, but friends have told this story before. So a close friend of theirs was in college and really low on cash. Like so low he was living in a run-down house with only a sleeping bag in it. Like completely empty except for a sleeping bag. While this guy was gone, a robber broke into his house. Shortly after, he gets home to see this robber staring in awe at his empty home. The robber asked how he lived like this and he just shrugged. The robber then leaves saying he’ll be back. He comes back with several other people and unloads lots of stolen furniture. Like a couch coffee table, lamps, etc. That man broke into a house to rob it and ended up giving up lots of stuff to some random college student.
#26 Mosh Pit Maiden
Mine happened to my best friend and me. We were 14, hardcore into the emo/punk music of 2011 and earlier. We were in the middle of a pit at a show for our favorite band, everyone is going nuts, but surprise. All of a sudden, my friend falls to the ground and pulls me with her, all I see are hundreds of feet jumping and stomping, some on our hands and hair and whatnot. Out of nowhere, the big muscular arms of an Amazonian goddess warrior of a woman part the sea of people, shoves about 15 behind her and onto the ground. She reaches down, grabs both of us in an arm each and plows over several people, elbowing faces and kneeing hips on the way to take us to safety. She’s my hero.
#25 Bananas To The Beat
In college, I used to lead a homeless outreach program that would provide food and conversation to the local homeless community. The problem is, we had no sponsors, and I, as a broke college student getting by on loans, was buying all the food each week.
To mitigate some of the damage, I would always self-checkout the bananas, and say they were the damaged ones being sold at a steep discount. I eventually got caught by this nice lady and didn’t do it again, but luckily got a hefty amount of funding from a past leader of the program who was now working full time and wanted to give back.
#24 A Hard Day’s Night
Many years ago when the Beatles were still together I got to know them and they asked me if I knew anyone that was a fan of theirs. So I told them this girl’s name and we went to her house. She was about 16 at the time. So I knock on her bedroom door and had the Beatles around the corner. I said to her “I have a few guys I know that heard you’re a Beatles fan and wanted to say hi.” Paul stuck his head around the corner and said: “Would you like us to sign your poster for you?” The four of them walked in. She was so stunned at first that she froze and then screamed. Then she asked, “can I just call my best friend?” So her best friend shows up to see them and then she screamed. Next thing I know there is about 50 kids crammed into this girl’s room and about 40 more out in the hallway. They stayed there, they stood on her bed to keep from getting crushed, and they signed posters, books, albums, dolls, whatever their fans had and made sure everyone got what they wanted. I’ve never seen such controlled chaos in my life.
#23 So Like Candy
My grandmother used to give away free, delicious candy at my grade school. It obviously caused a massive stampede when basically the whole school tried to fit into one small angle at the far end of the playground where the gate was resulting in smaller kids getting trampled in the sugar-fueled melee. She was barred from the premises.
#22 Man Of The Woods
During a music festival, I was strolling through the path near the woods when I saw an inebriated guy trying to get the attention of a girl. When he started to shout at her and grasp her hand, in like 1 millisecond the ENORMOUS punk guy with a red mohawk on his head ran out of woods, punched the guy in the face without even stopping, and returned to the woods. Instant K.O.
#21 Crazy Taxi
My parents told me this story. They were on holiday in Italy and ready to go home. As time was tight, they grabbed a cab to go to the airport. Halfway there they realize the cab is heading for the wrong airport. As they tell the driver that they need to get there fast, he just takes it as a challenge. He turns the car around and hits the gas. Now he’s swerving through traffic and changing lanes on the freeway. As they get into a more urban area, he takes a shortcut through a park, driving on the pedestrian paths. After a few more kilometers of this, they get to the airport in time and get on their flight. What a legend.
#20 I Came To Dig
I logged onto my brother’s class Minecraft server and booby-trapped a massive castle some kids were working on. I filled it with TNT and rigged it up to blow. Those kids had been harassing my brother in real life and on the server for months and the school did nothing.
Afterward, the principal had the server shut down because they “didn’t tolerate any kind of bullying.”
#19 Grilled Cheese If You Please
There was this dude at school who used to sell grilled cheese sandwiches fresh from his electric Foreman grill. The school told him he wasn’t allowed to sell food, so he sold napkins that happened to have food in them. They told him he couldn’t have appliances inside the school, so he plugged it in outside and used an umbrella to keep things dry. This continued for a while, with them pointing out rules and him exploiting loopholes. Eventually, he was defeated, but we still remember him fondly.
#18 I’m Shipping Up To Boston
I was at the Road Home to Boston tour that the Dropkick Murphys do on St. Patty’s Day every year. That concert gets LIT. Anyway, I’m hanging out on the side, just under the balcony. I finish my drink, and I’m just standing there because the crowd is nuts, the Dropkicks are belting out, “The Spicy McHaggis Jig,” and everyone is singing along.
All of the sudden, I feel an impact in my hand, and I look down and there’s a mostly full beer cup neatly fit inside my empty beer cup. I’m like, “What in the faux Irish heck?” I look up, and some wild looking dude with a mohawk is laughing and gives me the heavy metal horns from the balcony like 10 feet over my head. What else am gonna do? I yelled, “Sláinte!” and took a sip. It was not urine.
Thanks, most excellent mohawk guy! Stellar aim, by the way.
#17 School Bus Hero
I used to get bullied as a kid and the teachers at my school did nothing to stop it. This kid was the school football star and had a “rough childhood” (because that is a completely legitimate reason to make somebody else’s life horrible) so he was basically untouchable.
One day after two years of constant abuse, he sits next to me on the bus and just smashes my head into the window. Immediately this huge high school student rips this kid out of the seat and just says to him “you don’t sit near him anymore.” My bully never even looked in my direction after that day.
#16 Taxi Cab Confessions
I was inebriated and had tightened my hoodie around my face so I looked like Kenny from South Park, then I ran around the street looking for girls who were alone, waiting for their taxi. I waited with them until their taxi arrived so they felt safe and then I started to threaten the taxi driver that if he didn’t bring them home safe I would find him and punch the crap out of him.
#15 Mean Trampoline
I was watching my little brother play on the trampoline with my sister’s kids (so his nephews and niece). My brother was aged about 10, and my sister’s kids about 4-6. My dad’s friend’s kid comes over and plays on the trampoline too, he’s about 10 as well.
Skip forward a few minutes and the new kid keeps pushing down the little ones whilst playing a game of tag on the trampoline (I don’t even know how they thought of that one), and my little brother takes notice as one of the nephews starts to cry. So my little brother does exactly what I would’ve done in his situation. He pushes the other kid off the trampoline, lets the other kid get up angry, then jumps off the trampoline and does a flying sucker punch right into the kid’s jaw.
I was too busy standing in awe to help the other kid up or reprimand my brother. In the end, the other kid got in trouble and my little brother got ice cream.
#14 Stick ‘Em Up
So when I was in high school, my friend and I found out his younger brother was getting bullied by this bully their age. One day we were driving home from practice and he saw this kid pushing his brother, he parked the car, got out, grabbed the bully’s lacrosse stick and hit him in the face with it hard. He busted the kid’s mouth pretty good. I thought he was just gonna swear him out… nope.
#13 Just Like Magic
I knew a guy who had been a pickpocket for most of his teens and then transitioned into being a professional magician (mostly sleight of hand stuff, for obvious reasons) one day we were hanging out and he just stands up suddenly, walks a straight line and bumps into a guy. He apologizes, dusts him off and says have a nice day. Then he walked to another guy who was looking around concerned and says, “hey did you drop this?” and hands the guy his wallet.
I was watching him because I was confused as to where he was going and I still didn’t see him get the wallet back. It was beautiful.
#12 Planting New Life
My dad got sick of seeing a small patch of unkempt landscaping at a nearby gas station so he went in the middle of the night, ripped out the weeds and a bush, and put in new plants and mulch.
#11 Dog Day Afternoon
I was out running in a park and saw some kid’s dog running away from him straight towards me. It didn’t look like they were playing, but that the kid was actually struggling to get his dog back. I roared and charged straight at the dog, who immediately ran back to its owner.
#10 Feed The Children
I remember in middle school there was a lunch lady who would ever-so-slightly overcook cookies or pizza or fries from the snack line so that she could say that they were not suitable to sell and then she would give them to the kids who were getting the crappy meal because they had no money in their lunch accounts.
#9 A Double Accident
A friend was working in the ER when she was going to school and a woman came in who had her arm broken when someone stole her purse. As that woman was being checked, a man came in who was hit by a truck after the driver saw him stealing a woman’s purse and running away. The purse was returned.
#8 Tank You Very Much
I knew someone who once played an extended prank on a friend where he filled up his gas tank. When the tank was low, he’d steal his keys, sneak out, go to the station, fill it up, bring the car back and put the keys back. Took him months to figure out what was going on.
#7 Insane For Plantain
It’s 1998, there are tense elections in the Caribbean and the Dominican Republic. There were guys campaigning off a truck dropping free produce to locals. Some lady down the road from my aunt’s house got hit with 40lbs of a plantain batch to her face! She got up, smiled at the free food, and limped away happily.
#6 Yertle The Turtle
I was driving to work once and ran into dead-stopped traffic in a spot that I normally wouldn’t. A dude had his SUV stopped sideways across most of both lanes (one lane each way) to block traffic while he was picking up a turtle and bringing it across the road.
It messed up everyone’s commute for a few minutes just to save a turtle. Lots of people were honking and yelling but he didn’t even flinch or say anything. Got back in his car and drove off, never to be seen again.
#5 Dog In Despair
Many, many years ago on a hot summer day, I witnessed someone walk up to a car in a grocery store parking lot, wait for several minutes, then smash two windows with a rock (or a brick… was hard to see from my angle) so that the dog inside didn’t die of heatstroke. He then stormed inside of the store. I was just waiting for my mother to come back, and when she did, she told me all about how she heard some guy on the other end of the store yelling at FULL VOLUME.
#4 Coffee Shop Soundtrack
I was working at a coffee shop. This lady was on her phone and it was time to order. Generally, I handle this by going lawful evil and asking (as loudly as possible) as many applicable questions that require more than a yes/no answer as I can think of. On this particular day the tall man behind her just starts screaming “HANG THE PHONE UP AND ORDER!” then berates her publicly for being rude. It was everything I had ever wanted to say. He scared the crap out of the rude lady too.
#3 Live Another Day, Critters
I was at a market in Mozambique with a guide. Guide asks stall seller if he has any “really fresh” pangolin (illegal and endangered). Seller shows him a box with two live ones. Guide turns to me and yells “run,” punches the seller, grabs the box, and books it across the market toward where we had parked. He released the critters later that day. It was an interesting trip.
#2 Dan The Man
My friend Dan works in the city’s castle as a fire juggler and swordsman every day which requires him to have his gear on him at all times. This makes walking home with him after a night out feel better cause if someone in the street wants to cause trouble, Dan pulls out his sword and lights it up asking “are you sure you want to do this?”
Dan’s a cool guy.
#1 I’m A Barbie Girl
My two cousins (4 and 6) were picking on my sister due to the fact that she didn’t have a certain Barbie doll.
My older cousin walks over, takes the doll, snaps it in half, walks away, sister sitting there smiling away.
My two cousins later apologized to my sister, but my older cousin still laughs about that, even 3 years later.