December 10, 2019 | Scott Mazza

Mall Santas Share The Weird Things Kids Have Asked For


Taking your kids to go see Santa Clause is the best way to figure out what they really want for Christmas. You can probably already guess what they're wishing for—many kids zero in on popular gifts like video games and baby dolls—but every so often, a child will have a less conventional present in mind. From potatoes and a baby rhino to two rolls of tape, these mall Santas and elves share the weirdest things kids have asked for for Christmas.

Don't forget to check the comment section below the article for more interesting stories!

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#1 A Hot Dog

After waiting two hours in line my daughter asked Santa for a hot dog.

#2 To Be an Elf

I'm a teacher. I had one of my most difficult, obstinate, button-pusher kids come in at recess to talk to me. He said he was worried he would not get what he really wanted: to be a real elf, move to the North Pole and make all the presents. He had tears in his eyes and was the most sincere I had ever seen. Made me really appreciate how hard life was at home; he just wished for a way out.

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#3 Reindeer Eggs

Reindeer eggs so he could start his own franchise.

#4 Makeup and Boobs

Many years ago a small girl would not tell her mother what she wanted for Christmas. Mom told me the problem and I was to tell her after the kid jumped off my lap. The little girl hopped up and told me she wanted some makeup and some boobs.... Ok, now I have to tell mom.

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#5 A Magical Pen

I know the weirdest thing I asked for was a pen that could write like a pen, pencil, marker and crayon. I'd never seen one but was sure Santa could make it. I got a four-color pen instead.

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#6 A Coffee Maker

My uncle was a Santa and he told me that one year a kid asked for a coffee maker because he wanted to start his own Starbucks coffee stand instead of a lemonade stand. Apparently business was not very good as a lemonade stand but he noticed a lot of adults drink coffee, so he'd make coffee. That kid is probably a millionaire now.

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#7 A Whistle

I was a Santa at a party last week. A kid asked for a whistle that she could blow at night to wake her mom up and scare her when she was sleeping. I said, “No, that would put you on the Naughty list, let your mom sleep you little gremlin.” Mom laughed.

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#8 DVDs and CDs

I was an assistant manager for a mall Santa with Noerr Programs. There was a special needs 20-something guy that would come by nearly every day. He easily weighed more than 250 pounds so we did eventually convince him to sit next to Santa instead of on his lap. Every time he had to remind Santa what he wanted for Christmas. His list was Home Alone on DVD, Straight Outta Compton on DVD, and Prince's 1999 album on CD. Santa was awesome and brought him the Prince CD a few days before Christmas.

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#9 A Boyfriend for Mommy

During college, I was a department store Santa. One little girl, with her mother looking on at a distance, whispered: "Please bring a boyfriend for Mommy. Ever since Daddy died she's been so lonely. That's what I really want for Christmas, Santa." I looked up at her loving mother, and back at the girl, and felt a lump in my throat.

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#10 A Surprise

So literally last night we took my kids to see Santa and when asked what she wants for Christmas she says, “A Surprise.” Santa was so surprised he didn’t know what to say.

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#11 An Air Horn

Not a Santa, but I have been a Mrs. Claus for the last few years and I always ask the kids what they want while we do our crafts. My favorite was this four or five-year-old girl that told me she wanted "one of those loud horns." She made a gesture like she was using those canned air horns and she made a little horn sound. She said she wants to use it to wake up her baby brother when he naps in the daytime so he "knows what it's like."

#12 Toast

A piece of toast.

#13 Skeleton Guts

Not a Santa, but all the Santas will be surprised this year as my three-year-old daughter asks for skeleton guts for Christmas. She found an anatomy figurine at Barnes and Noble and has wanted “skeleton guts” ever since.

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#14 Black Men

My sister asked Santa for “black men” for Christmas. She meant Men in Black.

#15 A Doll

My father in law looked just like a real Santa. I used to mess with him around Christmas when we were out and about with a quick "Rudolf needs to get back to the pole, we need to hurry" I got a lot of really great looks from kids. The best was a shy little girl that came up and asked for some specific doll. Without missing a beat he says "I'm not sure what the heck that is but I'll have Legolas look into it" he always acted grumpy about but we all know he loved every second.

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#16 To Stop The Lies

For me to "stop upholding this charade."

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#17 A Horse's Head and Ice Cream

Not a mall Santa but once my sister asked Santa if she could have a horse's head and an ice cream cone. She explained that she was gonna paint the ice cream cone the colour of the horse, stick it on, mount the horses head to the wall and tell her friends she killed a unicorn. She doesn’t remember.

#18 A Girlfriend

I worked in Russia as "Snow Maiden." This is a Christmas character here, Santa Claus's granddaughter. One of the children in a wheelchair asked to walk again. It was hard. For people who wanted funny answer, in my practise was a boy who wanted a girlfriend. He was no more than six years old.

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#19 Sweet Pickles

My brother asked for sweet pickles and a Piggin’ String. He ended up with about eight jars of pickles and four or five Piggin’ Strings because when anyone asked that's what he said he wanted.

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#20 A Stepdad

Not a mall Santa but my friend was one. He said that the weirdest thing he heard from a kid was a husband for his mom.

#21 To Be Santa's Friend

Not Santa. My kid, when he was younger, had a habit of visiting Santa once to ask for gifts, and then a few more times during the season just to say hi. "Mom? Can I see Santa? There's no kids over there and he looks lonely so I could hang out with him." Then, "Santa came to daycare! I didn't ask him for presents, I just reminded him that I was good this year."

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#22 Crustless Bread

I once asked for bread with no crust. Come Christmas Day, I actually got an entire loaf of bread with no crust.

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#23 Two Rolls of Tape

Not the weirdest, but my favorite thing I have heard a kid ask for. At my daughter's preschool, there was a Santa. Kids were asking for the usual things, like toys and unicorns. One little girl goes up. You can tell she is thinking really hard. She asks for two rolls of tape. Dream big kid!

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#24 A Dolphin

Not a Santa but an elf. I read a letter (maybe I shouldn't have) from a child who asked for a dolphin, specifically not autistic. Not sure if he had had a bad experience with disabled dolphins or what but he was about six years old.

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#25 For Dad to Come Home

Worked as an elf for a couple of years and we had this "Wish Jar" that you could put slips of paper in. A little girl wrote something down on a piece of paper and folded it and quietly slipped it into the jar. The mom came rushing back after they left asking if we could get the paper out of the jar for her. She unfolded it and in crayon it said: "I want Dad to come home". The mother started crying and took it with her. Got some other weird and sad ones but that one hit me right in the feels.

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#26 A Divorce

I once asked Santa for my parents to get a divorce.

#27 A Tiny Broken Thing

My brother once asked for a “tiny broken thing." When Santa looked to my mother for guidance, she explained he likes fixing things.

#28 A Baby Rhino

My three-year-old son asked Santa once for “a baby rhino.” Santa told him that “the baby rhinos mama would be very sad to lose her baby though.” Then my son said, “Okay, well I’ll take the mama too, maybe she can sleep in my mom's bed”

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#29 Thor's Hammer

My kid asked Santa for Thor's hammer. Christmas morning he opens up Thor's hammer. So happy. First thing he did was chuck it across the living room and into the kitchen. Dishes smash, glass all over the floor. The kid was pissed it didn't come back to him. The look on his face. Pure Christmas devastation.

#30 Lightbulbs

My nine-year-old kid asked for lightbulbs. I am sure Santa wasn’t expecting that.

#31 A Mouse and a Snake

Yesterday the big sister asked for a pet mouse, the little sister asked for a snake.

#32 A Komodo Dragon

When I was a kid I asked for a komodo dragon.

#33 A Real Horse

My kid told the mall Santa she wanted a real horse not a fake one Santa! she said. He gave me a look.

#34 Manchester United to Win

Not a Santa, not even an elf, but my older sister is an elf this year, and a six-year-old boy said that he just wanted Man United to win the league. What's best is that Santa said, "I can't work miracles now kid."

#35 Mom's Cancer to Go Away

I was made to play Santa at my unit's Christmas party. A kid asked for Mommy's cancer to be gone and I told her to be a good kid and trust Mommy's doctors and that if she did, Santa would help Mommy's doctors and Mommy would have a better chance of beating cancer. Nine months later, Mommy is given the all-clear.

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#36 A Cheeseburger

Not technically a "mall" Santa but, My neighbour was a Santa for a community brunch years ago and a little girl asked for a cheeseburger. Not that odd on its own I suppose but, an odd request for the holiday and from such an important and magically being.

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#37 Blue Juice

When I was a little kid, about three or four years old, I told a mall Santa that I wanted blue juice for Christmas. The Santa looked at my mom like, "Wtf does he mean by this," and my mom was just as clueless as he was. My mom, being awesome, went out and found blue juice.  To this day, I have no clue why I wanted the blue juice. I just knew I wanted it, so that's what I told Santa. You bet that I drank every last one of those things.

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#38 Mom's Milk

My dad was a mall Santa. A kid asked for his mom's milk he was like seven.

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#39 A Lawnmower

When I was five years old (49 years ago) I asked a Santa in JC Penny's at the time for a real lawnmower, the kind that my dad uses. They had me hold a microphone up to my mouth. My answer (along with every other kid I presume) was broadcast throughout the whole store. I can still hear the laughter from the adults.

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#40 100 Kids

I once had a boy who said he wanted to be married and have 100 kids so he could have 100 friends. And no one can say no to being his friend.

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#41 A Goat

Not a Santa, but I personally remember once asking for a goat and a sniper rifle.

#42 A Skull

A human skull.

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#43 A Real-Life Pokémon

I was an elf at a charity event. I overheard a kid asking Santa for a real-life Pokémon, not a plushie or a Pokémon themed toy, a living Pokémon. I'm sure the kid was sat there for about five minutes making sure Santa fully understood the request.

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#44 A Time Machine

I overheard a mom saying to her son just outside Santa's grotto, "You can't ask for a time machine, they are just too big for the elves to build."

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#45 Potatoes

I remember hearing the girl in front of me in line when I was at the mall as a kid say she wanted potatoes. I hated potatoes at the time, so I was repulsed.

161220-F-KQ923-013Air Force Reserve Command


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